In return, Michelle explains showgirls to them -- "lotta feathers on my head, like a flock full" -- and her own pedigree (ABT). There is also this fantastic exchange:
Teens: "I think Vegas sounds exciting!"
Michelle: "It has a lot of Victoria's Secrets?"
Boo brings up the Joffrey program, causing Sasha to melt to the floor in a spontaneous combustion of crumminess, and Michelle zeroes in on Boo's lack of confidence and her big bones and all that.
"Well, auditions can be tricky. Do you have a good audition outfit? You have to have a kickass audition outfit, something that makes you feel really powerful. My go-to outfit was a fire-engine red unitard, with a thin gold belt with tassels on it... Everyone's outfit differs. It just has to make you feel strong. That's the key to any audition. Attitude. You have to show up confident, and be ready to do or be anything they want in an instant. I once got an audition for a Broadway show, totally last minute, I grabbed my bag, I ran thirty blocks, I walked in the door? It was for Dreamgirls."
The teens gasp; one of them asks what happens.
Michelle: "I got a callback."
Teens: "Shut up!"
Michelle: "Attitude, my friends."
So I guess the moral of the story is, a croissant with enough of this "attitude" can fool the eye into thinking she's a GPS device, as long as she's pretty and white? Because... I dunno, I kind of love how it keeps flipping back and forth, but ultimately it's like, twenty years later I still remember this movie review of Life Is Beautiful that said basically the message was only the very most hilarious people deserved to escape the Holocaust. (That still cracks me up.) But as far as Boo's ass or Ginny's breasts, the message seems to be really waffly about this issue. Can Boo join the Joffrey program or not? I guess we'll find out, half a season from now.
Or maybe this distinction won't matter by then. Maybe it'll continue to do this back and forth, and make its point that way, or maybe it's just a fight I'm going to have with the show. I mean, Ryan Murphy has been doing this same insincere uncommitted shit since his first TV show in 1999, with -- oddly, but consistently and very specifically, second-wave Anita Hill feminist issues and Downs Syndrome (I'll never forget one character's straight-faced and ever-so-'90s empowered assertion, "When you look at my body, no matter what I'm wearing, you're taking away my choice!") -- and he still hasn't come up with anything vaguely like a considered opinion about those things, so I guess we'll see?