What's Your Damage, Heather?

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 6 USERS: B-
Blood In/Blood Out/La-La-La

Sasha immediately locates a "filthy" Raggedy Anne doll whose ass was once ripped in half. While Boo continually points out that how cool the house actually is, Melanie and a random in the bathtub discuss how probably Michelle is a made-up kind of crazy person that acts normal in the daytime and rips doll's assholes open at night.

For being so boring in absolutely every way, Melanie's kinda got a lot going on in this episode.


Michelle: "[Ballet words. Is a good teacher. Which we knew, from the first episode where it was established that she's a good teacher.]"

The class starts doing a great dance, but then Truly and Terry Bellefleur get into a fight. This happens ... for a very long time, and more than once. Terry claps for them.

Terry: "You, girl with the big ears. At first glance you don't look like you have a speck of grace. But you are a gazelle. All of you."
Truly: [Weird bitchy ranting.]"
Michelle: "Wasn't that weird?"
Class: "No weirder than anything you ever do, but here's a pity laugh."

Everybody just abruptly wanders out of the place and Michelle goes upstairs to see what Truly's autism has come up with, as far as her reasons to be an off-putting asshole this week. I guess it's because they are in love? I guess that's why. How cool.

Hey, remember that time Truly spit entire mouthfuls of liquid into a bottle she was sharing with two other women? Remember how endearing that made her, on a show filled with people who are similarly endearing and nobody who is actually that much fun to be around?

This Show Bunheads: "Kelly Bishop, she's not really necessary. What we need is the incredibly rude weirdo that has vendettas against all the other characters for no reason, and is also the Typhoid Mary of gingivitis. Let's cram her in there as much as possible. Oh, and she can have a bitchy, nonsensical rivalry with Michelle, who is all of the above and more, and they will just spend every waking moment together for no reason at all. Just bitching and moaning and acting like the other one is the crazy one. Plus now a guy with an eyepatch, so you've got three at once. Hey, remember that guy with the private road and the telescope and he wouldn't let her drink his wine with him? The squirrels were exploding? Didn't think so! You'll see awful Rico and his horrible, awful family thrice more before we mention him again. If ever. This ain't Constantinople, motherfucker."

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