Burn Notice

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: B- | 1454 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Crash into Me

Michael comes into Madeline's house, having just fixed the taillight on the Charger in her garage. See what I mean? He's got two other projects going on and he takes the time to patch up his car. Although I'm sure he'd claim that's just so his mint-condition black 1972 Charger doesn't look too distinctive. "Just wear and tear," he claims when Madeline asks what happened to it. "Whatever," she says in that tone that means she doesn't believe him but isn't going to press it. She's getting better at that tone all the time. She's busy packing a beach bag, because she's off for a little outing -- with Tina. Michael's just about to get into that with her when Tina herself comes in. Michael pastes on a smile for her benefit, and she says Madeline's lucky to have a son who visits so often. Madeline snarks that he was gone for a couple of decades, and they're out of there. A moment later, Sam calls Michael on his cell phone to say that based on what he just heard over Ryan's listening device, he's pulling the Death Wish scam right now. "He's paying some poor old guy to get knocked in front of the 5:35 commuter train." Michael checks his watch and realizes that time is so short, they can't even call the cops! They'll just have to rush over and blow the scheme themselves.

"When you work under a cover, whether you're a cop, a DEA agent, or a spy, you're getting into business with the bad guys," Michael VOs. We see Ryan behind the wheel of a sporty blue Infiniti as he and a couple of small trucks screech into position, bookending a city utility truck. "Your job is to stay in control of that business," Michael's VO continues. Michael is not doing a good job, then. "Sometimes they take your ideas and resources and hurt innocent people. It's every undercover agent's worst nightmare." So maybe Michael should have pitched a nice, safe bake-sale scam instead. Further up the road, a guy sits waiting in a car as a railroad crossing gate goes down in front of him. He hears the train a-coming. It's rolling 'round the bend. "Which is why you do whatever it takes to make sure that doesn't happen," the VO says, just as Michael and Sam come screaming around the corner behind Ryan and his team, in the Charger and that maroon SUV, respectively (even though Sam told Michael on the phone that he was getting fresh wheels). "Boxing in a large vehicle and forcing it into a crash takes a coordinated group effort," Michael continues. "It's a little like flying planes in formation if one of the planes is trying to get away. Very difficult, and very, very dangerous." And yet Ryan was able to organize it in a matter of hours. Maybe we're all selling him short. Sam makes it even more dangerous by bumping the SUV on the city truck's right, bouncing it off some parked cars and up onto the sidewalk. Yeah, they're all about public safety, aren't they? Good thing no one was on the sidewalk or in those parked cars, or who knows how many bystanders would have just gotten killed to save one guy who's willingly participating in a car crash. "The good news is that when a plan requires clockwork timing and precise movement, it doesn't take much to ruin that precision." With that, Michael bumps Ryan's car into a spin-out, then pulls up next to him to glare at him out the window before driving away, I guess just to make sure Ryan knew it was Michael. The truck is now free to turn off, avoiding the car waiting at the railroad crossing and averting a real crash. "Do it right and you can avoid sending anyone to the morgue." The train passes by harmlessly. "You may bruise a few egos, though," the VO admits as Michael drives off, leaving Ryan to thump his steering wheel in frustration.

Burn Notice

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