Burn Notice

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M. Giant: A | Grade It Now!
Simon Says

Michael returns to Simon ands says he figured out a way in. "And the surveillance?" Simon asks, still fooled by Michael's lie. "I took care of it," Michael says coldly. Especially for someone who just committed vehicular arson. At least the fire department's already on its way to help that poor street vendor. And anyway, the property damage we're going to see tonight is only going to ramp up from here.

Back at Madeline's, Agent Callahan can't help noticing how Michael has failed to show up, and has figured out that she gave Michael a signal to stay away. Too bad the FBI got involved; if this were still just Miami-Dade PD, Detective Paxson would have left hours ago, looking more bored than ever. And if Lane and Harris were still on the case, the one with the hairspray helmet would be too afraid of Madeline's cigarette to get in her face at all. Not fooled by Madeline's claim of innocence, Callahan tries another approach, asking how much she knows about Michael. "I prefer to give him his privacy," she says, which is true enough depending on her mood. Callahan claims that Michael kills people. Not nearly enough, if you ask me. He shows Madeline some photos of the same greatest hits Simon showed Michael earlier. Madeline feels sick, but Callahan won't let her look away. "He didn't do this," Madeline whispers, at least 95% sure of it. Callahan is like, "You think he's gonna say, 'Sorry mom, I blew up a bus today?'" Well, given how bad Michael is at lying to his mom, he wouldn't have to. Callahan again asks where she was planning to meet Michael, and after a long drag on her cigarette, she directs him to the food court at the Sawgrass Mills Mall and pushes the file off the table. "Thank you," Callahan says, because it's not like he has to clean up her floor.

Fi and Sam are staking out the house of the guy Fi has successfully tracked as Simon's explosives expert. They can see the guy through his giant front window, wandering around in his bathrobe. "He's got more guns in there than a little African country," Fi remarks. Sam figures they shouldn't knock on the front door, and cues a car commercial by asking, "Fi, how does this baby handle?"

The little Hyundai speeds through the residential streets, ostensibly to get a running start but really so the commercial's voice-over announcer, who sounds a lot like Michael, has time to say, "When entering a possible combat situation, you want the element of surprise on your side. It's why special forces like to rappel down from helicopters. Of course, if you don't have a helicopter, you may have to improvise." At least that sales pitch is a departure from the usual blather about standard features and superlatives like how it's the best, most efficient, safest, or cookie-smellingest car in its class. The car skids around, losing most of its momentum in a 90-degree spin at the bottom of the driveway, then crashes right through the bomber's front window and into his living room. This does little for the space's feng shui. The householder stands stunned for about a second, then runs to the end of the room for a weapon, "Hi, honey I'm home," Sam quips as he and Fi get out with their guns on him, making him drop his. "Keith -- Hotel Bomber," the subtitles say. Well, at least knowing they have the right guy will save some time.

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Burn Notice




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