Burn Notice

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: B- | Grade It Now!
Past & Future Tense

Next day, Marv is floating around in the hotel pool, and Fi manages to bump into him on a pool float of her own and pretend to an admirer whom he's met before. In addition to being all flirty, she acts like she has some translation software to sell and offers to set up a private meeting. With a guilty look over at his wife, Marv agrees. I don't have a joke here, but if you don't already know about the joke George Clooney once played on Richard Kind and his cat when they were roommates, go look it up. It's better than any joke I could put here anyway.

Fi meets back up with Jesse in the hotel, and after telling him it's all set up with Marv, she makes her case to Jesse telling him to give up on getting back in and doing good where he can. It's because she's already seen this with Michael. Which of course means she should probably also know better than to waste her breath. Sure enough, Jesse insists, "I'm not stopping until the people that burned me are six feet under." Fi refrains from asking if he would mind being very old before that happens.

Outside the hotel, Sam tries to waylay Congressman Cowley by pretending to be a vet with disability issues. "I'm one of your constituents," he warns. "Yeah, but just one," sighs "Bill Cowley - Congressmen" from the back of his limo before rolling up the window. "This isn't over!" Sam calls after the departing car. Did he really think it would be that easy to have a one-on-one with a member of Congress? Maybe he should have waved a briefcase full of cash. Instead, Sam calls up Madeline for help. Luckily, she already hates Bill Cowley, so she's up for whatever. Especially since she hasn't actually been seen on the show since the first of the month.

Michael and Paul show up outside Paul's place, which the Russians do indeed have staked out so tightly that Michael and Paul can just get out of the car and discuss Michael's metaphysical future right there on the street. Of course Paul says that Michael reminds him of himself when he was younger, and warns him that eventually you start just collecting ghosts. Michael remarks that Paul doesn't seem all that haunted. "Rum helps," Paul explains. "A lot." So does sleepwalking through your performance. But on to the issue of how to get into Paul's place. Michael opens the trunk to reveal their buddy Alexi tied up, wearing explosives and not much else. That'll be the diversion while Paul gets the file. Sucks to be Alexi, man.

Michael somehow gets Alexi on his knees out on the street without anyone noticing, and calls out Vitali and his other guy. "I'm Michael Westen," he tells Vitali. "Yeah, that one," he adds, seeing Vitali's reaction. Michael wants Vitali and his team to leave town. Vitali draws on Michael, saying that if he kills Michael Westen, he becomes a Russian hero. Michael breaks the news, (because apparently Vitali is blind and was going to shoot at the sound of Michael's voice) that Alexi is loaded down with enough C4 to kill them all, and Michael's holding the detonator with a dead man's switch, which means Alexi will explode if Michael gets shot. "No more Alexi, no more Vitali, no more...that guy." The Russians put down their guns, and Vitali tell Michael he's next after Paul. Michael takes off, having bought himself and Paul the few minutes it's going to take Vitali to defuse Alexi. But at least there are no bystanders, passersby, or anyone else at all to distract them, because you'd think one of them might have had something to say about a bunch of guys in suits having a standoff over another guy in his underwear and a bomb in the middle of the street.

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Burn Notice




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