Burn Notice

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My Two Sams
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"Let me tell you a story," Michael says. Not in voice-over, but speaking directly to us, with his nose practically pressed against the camera lens, while lullaby music tinkles on the soundtrack. In some kind of weird previouslies sequence, he tells us all about the bomb that almost killed him, which he traced to the bomber, whose money he traced to a fake Cayman Islands bank manager, which led...nowhere. "Whoever tried to kill me is paranoid, careful, and he knows I'm close." And it's Victor, but Michael's leaving that part out. Probably because, as we now see , he's been talking to Carla, in one of their little meetings in public by the water. I choose to be glad to see her again, because even though the two episodes she's been in this half-season were pretty weak, it's probably not Tricia Helfer's fault that they shot scripts that needed another round of punch-ups. Anyway, she says she wants to believe him, but she has doubts about why he's suddenly become so talkative with her. Michael says he has to be careful, and he wants Carla's people to back off. "I can't draw him out with the suits-and-sunglasses crowd following me around." Because Michael kind of blends in with them, after all. Carla considers it, and says they'll do it his way if they can confirm his story. But she warns, "If you hold back on me, Michael --" "You'll go after my family? Kill me?" Michael finishes, bored. "Talking with you is always such a pleasure." Indeed. My boss never says things like that to me, but my old one did.

Michael returns to where Fi is waiting by the Charger, pissy that Michael didn't tell Carla about Victor. "He's the one enemy I know Carla has," Michael explains. "I'd like to at least talk to him before I turn him in." Fi has her doubts, because that's what Fi does.

Back at the loft, Michael gives Fi a photo of Victor that he got from somewhere, somehow, and asks her to show it around. "I'll tell people he's wanted in connection with a dog fighting ring," Fi offers. "They'll call." Just then Madeline slams into the loft, and she's got her grump on about having been spirited away from her house by Sam. Michael breezily says he's just "trying to lock things down as fast as I can." He tries to put a good face on it, saying she doesn't have to leave town this time; she can stay with him. You'd think his mom would love that, but she's too spun up to do anything but call his place a dump. Michael shushes her -- not just because she's rude and noisy, but because he hears someone coming in the front gate, which Sam says he remembered to lock. He, Michael, and Fi all draw guns in preparation for invaders, and Madeline grabs a bread knife. Don't ask me why Michael owns a bread knife. Michael whips open the front door, and there stands B-movie queen Dina Meyer of Saw, Starship Troopers, and Bats fame. "Sam," Michael whispers. "Yeah, Mike?" asks Sam. "He was talking to me," says Dina Meyer as she steps inside. Fi asks who she is. "I'm Samantha," she says. "Michael and I used to be engaged." That shuts everyone up, except the subtitles, which swoop in with a helpful, "Samantha -- Michael's Ex-Fiancé." I think they mean "fiancée." Dina Meyer may have a strong jaw, but I don't think anyone's going to mistake her for a dude.

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Burn Notice

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