The Day Of The Dead

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Aaron: B+ | Grade It Now!
Sister? But I just kissed her!

Well, I guess "bruja" is Spanish for "sociopathic pregnant proto-lesbian who can see the future," because we next cut to La Cooch, shoving Pa Pimperson into Sofie's trailer for a reading. Spanish is a very economical language. Pa insists that the fortune-telling business is all a con game, but La Cooch claims that sociopathic pregnant proto-lesbians are highly respected in the Hispanic community. She even coughs up the two bits to pay for him. "I'll try anything once," he mutters, finally giving in. Then he notices Mommatose in the back of the tent. "Hey there, Appy," he shouts. "I like your new hairdo!" "You know she's not deaf, right?" whispers Sofie. Heh. She has Pa take a seat and shuffle the cards, and then tells him to ask whatever he wants to know. "What color is my piss going to be tomorrow?" he wonders, and if you really need a fortune teller to answer that question for you, then it's probably time to pay a visit to the doctor. Ouch. He tells her to just go ahead and start, and she flips over the first card. It's "The Hierophant" (Pa: "That's a word you don't hear everyday"), which means he's a man with great power and authority over others. Except it's upside-down at the moment, so it means exactly the opposite. The next card has two lovers on it, and Pa remarks that it's definitely a good card for him. "It means a strong partnership or union," explains Sofie. Pa assumes this refers to him and Ma, but the next card is the Two of Cups, which means there's a new relationship in his life. Sofie stops to listen to Mommatose, and then looks back to suggest that this could be referring to La Coocharaca. Pa thinks Mommatose saw his eyes twitching or something, but Sofie insists it's all in the cards. "Suuuuure it is," he jokes. The next card is The Knight of Swords. "That, um, means there's another man in your house," Sofie explains. "There's a lot of other men in my house," replies Pa Pimperson, which is also not the sort of thing you hear every day. Mommatose speaks up again (so to speak), and Sofie is forced to clarify that the card means it's just one man, who keeps coming back. "And he's not a johnny," she adds sadly. "He's a friend." Pa desperately wants to know who it is, and Mommatose seems only too happy to reveal the name. Sofie, however, gets angry, and calls her mother a liar. Then she kicks Pa out, and refuses to give him any more information. "Who else knows about this?" she asks Mommatose, as soon as Pa is gone. "Does Libby know?" We don't get any answer, but I think I can safely say that I wouldn't want to be Jonesy right now. Or a Limpie, for that matter. With Sofie's already demonstrated fondness for using scissors, that jiggle could be in dire jeopardy.

And, in fact, we do immediately cut to Sofie (get it?), standing outside getting a cup of coffee. She looks up just in time to see Jonesy limp over to a table near where Ma Cooch is sitting. The three of them all look at each other silently, and no one seems very happy. Sofie, in fact, looks downright evil. Eeeeeevil!

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