And speaking of guys with dirt on their face, Ben and Adrienne Barbeau are busily hunting for snakes in a vast open field. Adrienne explains that snake charming is actually quite lucrative, because there's something about watching a woman with a snake that makes a man "downright percolated." Ordinarily I'd put a sentence here mocking such an obviously goofy turn of phrase, but at this particular moment I'm too busy sliding in my Blade Runner DVD to reminisce about Joanna Cassidy, her glitter-coated naked snake-charming scene, and her supa-fly transparent plastic raincoat. Ahh. Good times. And while we're on the subject, does anyone remember that mildly famous poster from the '80s with the naked woman and the snake on it? I'll give a Reader Mailbag shout-out next week to anyone who can identify her for me, even though I'm not really sure why I care. At any rate, Adrienne relates the whole snake-percolating thing back to the Garden of Eden, and then goes out of her way to specify that she's talking about the Bible. Oh, for God's sake, I know Ben is dumber than a box of hair, but no one is that dumb. I mean, they've all read the recap, right?
Note to self: Stop linking so much.
Ben reveals that he's actually spent quite a lot of time reading the Bible, although he does list a fairly large number of books that all aren't Genesis, so maybe his reading comprehension isn't any better than his personal hygiene. Heh. Maybe he's really a secret member of the Coin-Puking Dirty clan. That might actually explain a lot. In fact, I'm surprised it hasn't come up in the speculation thread yet. Lord knows every other possibility has. Ben also adds that he's had enough of the Bible "for one lifetime," without any mention of whether that also includes Scudder's lifetime. Adrienne changes the subject, and explains that they're looking for either a "hog nose" or a "plainbelly." Yeah. I don't even need a joke here. Those words are funny all by themselves. She also warns Ben to watch out for "cottonmouths," because she got bit once in Ft. Worth a few years back, and almost died. Wow. What the hell does Dan Knauf have against Texas? I mean, I get that south is hell and north is heaven (because Minnesota is where Prince lives, of course), but Dan hates Texas like Joss hates his father, and that just seems weird. Adrienne also reveals that it was ol' "Hack Scudder" who pulled her through, just by laying his hand on her cheek. When she tries to replicate the gesture with Ben, he recoils, explaining that he comes from a distinctly non-touchy-feely kind of family. "That's a shame," whispers Adrienne, as she reaches out to try and caress him a second time. "We're all about inappropriate familial touching in this carnival." She strokes his face, and they share a moment, but they totally fail to kiss. Sigh. Whatever. It's almost enough to make me miss Patti and Rebadow.