Carrie Diaries
Dangerous Territory

Episode Report Card
Carla Sparks: B+ | 1 USERS: B+
YOU GRADE IT
The Divine Canapé

Tom and Harlan have a walk and talk. Tom is hung up on his ring still, not anything important like any of the legal casework sitting back at his desk. Harlan notes that his son is "wining and dining" Tom's daughter, and maybe lightly alludes to the fact that he hopes George will get laid. It's all Harlan could want for his son.

In the hallway, Walt and Mouse have a chat about sex and how to properly hold a penis in one's tiny Asian hands.

Keeping it in the family, Tom runs over a woman's foot with his car on the way home. He tends to fixate, this Tom. Anyway, the lady looks like the tampon lady from the grocery store but isn't. They're all the same to me.

Back at the office, Carrie is all ready to go to the soiree. Barbara tells her everything will be fine, as long as she remembers to tell Kick that the canapés are divine and that their Basquiat is so much better than some other asshole's. George shows up in a tuxedo -- uh oh, he forgot to mention that it's formal and Carrie is dressed cocktail. There can only be one solution: MAKEOVER. Please makeover. Not quite makeover, though, as Carrie just makes do with several layers of black/sapphire tutus. Yeah, those were just lying around the office. Classic Carrie Bradshaw.

They arrive at the party and Kick seems perfectly nice, but she invited George's ex, Blythe. I can see that Blythe will be the problem, not Kick. Or perhaps neither of them will prove to be a real problem.

Meanwhile, Mouse and Walt are watching porn... I mean Kama Sutra together. If there's one thing Mouse knows how to do, its study. Maggie, not talking about sex for once, is trying to defend her booth from those bitches. The scene is so inconsequential, I'd rather watch Mouse and Walt try to figure out sex together.

Back at the soiree, Blythe doesn't want to talk about her stint in rehab and some other D-bag thinks the DMV is near the Dominican Republic. They don't know what it is because none of them drive. They all have drivers. Did they mention that they're rich? George is pulled away for a French-speaking emergency and Blythe tells Carrie that some day George will get tired of slumming and go back to her. Now that she's out of rehab and all. Carrie gets up to leave and runs into a waiter, who spills his tray. It is the worst thing that has ever happened to her on this show.

Carrie makes a call to Mouse, who is preparing to sex Seth up. Carrie feels small, and Mouse reassures her that no one in the real world likes jewel-themed parties. That is very sound advice. Carrie's friends are always advising her and sticking up for her, but she never really helps them. She didn't give Mouse any advice on her big moment with Seth. It appears she didn't need it, though.

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Carrie Diaries

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