Cashmere Mafia
Yours, Mine And Hers

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Yours, Mine And Hers
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Previously: Mia met Jack's new girlfriend, Liz. Zoë was having problems with a male colleague at work trying to push her to the side. Alicia told Caitlin she was pregnant, which sounds more and more ridiculous the farther away from it we get. Zoë advised Juliet to get an attorney to protect her assets, but Davis already got the one Juliet wanted.

To the just-not-out-of-date-enough-to- seem-like-it's-desperate-to-seem-that-way strains of "Stronger" by Kanye West, we see the requisite quick cut shots of New York. Mia enters her office wearing a leopard-print skirt and a brown turtleneck with fur-capped sleeves. It's amazing. She gets a call on her cell from Zoë urgently asking her if she's okay. Mia then suddenly gets a call on her work phone from Caitlin, asking her if she's taking a sick day. Mia is less interested in asking why someone would out-of-the-blue ask such a question than in reminding Caitlin that she went to work when she had double pneumonia. She gets a call on the other line from Juliet, telling her that she will be there for her. Suddenly Mia's like, "What's happening?" She compares the feeling she's having to when your parents tell you they've taken your dog out (she really punches "out") to the country. Then, Tracy brings in a muffin on a plate, stammering that it's Tracy's favorite muffin and hat she hopes it helps Mia the way it helps her. Fine, Tracy just has to have food issues because she's bigger than the other girls.

Mia hangs up all her phones just as Clive enters and throws a newspaper on her desk. We see an article with a picture of Jack, and the headline "Jack Cutting Named Publisher at Fairgate Communications." Odd that the publisher of a major magazine company knows this info after her friends in finance, hotel, and beauty products do. Somebody needs to read their morning periodicals. Mia acts like she already knows about Jack, saying she has a chocolate-covered grenade on its way to him already. I don't know what it is with this show, but I have to have my closed captioning on half of the time to figure out what the hell they are saying. Am I the only one? I swear, either I'm ninety or these people are not using good diction. Clive says that Jack's new job makes Mia's ex-fiancé her biggest headache, as if he wasn't already. This Clive, he certainly loves to express emotions with his face.

Juliet is power-walking through a hallway with her lawyer, Blair. Blair tells her to breathe during their divorce mediation meeting, because nothing makes a wife look terrified like when her voice gets high. Juliet says that she was a debutante, so her voice couldn't get high if she sucked on helium. Is there something I'm missing? Do debutantes have special low-talking classes?

In the meeting, Juliet tries to be civil. Their offer is that Juliet and Davis both keep what they've earned, share custody of Emily with Emily living with Juliet, and have the girls stay in the apartment. Davis's lawyer counters that Davis's career suffered because he supported the Juliet's "craven ambitions." So, Davis wants to keep his money and get additional support. "Man-imony?" asks Blair. She's a real pro. Also, Davis wants the apartment. "What? He can't do that!" screeches Blair in a really high voice. But, she brings it back low: "Can he?" Somebody's going to lose her debutante's license.

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Cashmere Mafia

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