Chains of Love

Episode Report Card
Stee: A- | 547 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Moron than off

The kids now get into the hot tub, and Jenny yells that it feels good. Slim shakes his ass, dancing. Adam says he wanted to run away from Slim’s ass-shaking but part of the strategy was to play along. Slim climbs on top of Adam and bumps his cock into Adam’s face. Lord. More dancing. Kristian then gets up and mocks Slim’s dancing, but badly. Adam dances reluctantly, and then Slim tries to make Chris dance, but he laughs to us, saying he didn’t want to. These people. Jenny says that Chris needs someone to take him out of his shell. No, please don’t bother.

Now Jenny reads what the boys wrote about her. Adam says shit about her smile and humble nature. Slim then grabs Kristian’s paper and mockingly reads what Kristian said about Jenny; Kristian is just worried about Slim reading what he said about Slim. Jenny then reads it: Kristian calls Slim a “deadbeat” and then says that with the tattooed arms and “gay contacts” he would bet that Slim would rather be chained to four guys. Man, that’s funny. Slim looks very mad. Jenny is all, “No he di’n’t!” Slim then tells us that he wanted to drown Kristian. Jenny then tells us that she felt bad, but her impressions of people have changed; Adam is still in the lead. Adam then tells us that he wants Jenny to be “wined and dined,” and now even he is starting to piss me off with his earnest crap.

Bedroom. Jenny again tells us that she’s never been chained up to four guys before, and that they all started sweet but their true natures are starting to come out. Darkness. Fast-motion infrared cam. Kristian is curled up on Jenny. Slim keeps curling up to Adam. I’m not kidding. Man, I need a cigarette, and a nap, and a new show, in that order.

Ah, sweet comm-- No! No commercials! Ah, this is where we’re supposed to get commercials! I fucking hate you, show.

Morning. They wake up. Brush teeth. MM voice-overs that they get solo bathroom breaks all through the day. I still think they should have to poo in front of each other. That would be a show. Breakfast. Kristian says that he almost hit Slim because he was snoring so loud. Everyone agrees. Jenny is mad. Kristian, the tool that he is, does a shot of tequila. He says, “That was disgusting.” God.

Chains of Love

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