Jeannie then gets seasick as the kids fish. She pukes in the bathroom. John says that at least she made it to the toilet, but it took her away for a critical time. She revives and does some fishing. Natalie catches a fish. Then we see a boat coming. It’s the Locksmith, standing at the front all “I’m the fat of the world!” “Uh-oh,” says John, thankfully not even trying this time. Commercials. Bye Jeannie.

We’re back, and as the Locksmith approaches on his boat, I see a graphic on the corner of my screen that says, “2 Hour Series Finale. Wednesday.” I freak the fuck out until I rewind and discover it’s for Star Trek: Voyager. Man, I was going to have to hurt someone for a minute there.

So kids stand on the deck and John talks, saying the person he’s booting and he never connected and is too materialistic. It’s Jeannie. He gives her seven hundred and fifty dollars to buy a lifetime supply of seasickness pills. Okay. John has to realize how totally unfunny that was. Maybe you should stick to lawyering, brother. Jeannie takes off on a boat with the Locksmith, and between his bulk and her boobies, the boat immediately sinks to the bottom of the ocean.

The ghost of the Locksmith and Jeannie walk to the short bus now, Jeannie saying that if there’s no chemistry, there just isn’t. John tells us she’s “hardcore materialistic.” Jeannie in turn tell us she doesn’t know where he gets that; then she asks the Locksmith if he owns this jeep or if it’s the show’s. She says she didn’t click with anyone, and disappears down the road. So long.

House. Night. Hot tub. John asks Natalie if she likes getting spanked. She says yes, and that sometimes she likes a “smack on the ass.” John then says, “Come on, sisters. Let’s kick it up.” Natalie then bends over, and he and Kim spank her very poorly. I know you guys are chained, but bad technique, people. Really. John then tool-overs that Natalie is not so sweet and innocent. Uh, did the pussy tattoo tell you nothing, John? Natalie then tells us that when she drinks too much, she gets too aggressive, and she doesn’t want John to think she’s a freak. We see her drink a lot, and then John pretty much cuts her off, saying they’re ready for bed.