A Witch In Time

Episode Report Card
Demian: B+ | Grade It Now!
A witch in time...

Casa Del Cole. Piper and Raige clomp into the living room behind Cole, bitching all the way about Bacarra's "Jedi master" powers. Cole sneers at the tedious pop-culture reference and shuts the grouchy Ps up with what little information he has regarding Bacarra, as well as offering them the dark details of Phoebe's future should she continue to defy The Angel Of Death. Piper's eyes widen in dismay once The Angel's name is tossed into the mix. "We're screwed," she breathes. No, Piper. Gonzo's screwed, and trust me: Great will be the rejoicing upon his long-overdue demise. Impetuous, clueless Raige immediately proposes that they vanquish Death's ass. Piper patiently explains that Death and his ass exist beyond the realm of protection spells and vanquishes and such, and once he's drawn a target on someone's back, that's it. "If it's [Gonzo's] time to go, there's nothing we can do," she notes, adding, "I told Phoebe rebounds never work!" Heh. Piper then suspiciously wonders why Cole's associating with warlocks six months hence. Cole dismissively insists that that's not important at the moment. What is important is that the sisters guard against possible Bacarra attacks while at the same time ensuring that Gonzo dies. Raige knits her brow as Piper shakes her head and examines her shoes.

Aerie Of The Gonzo. The Chinless Wonder lounges on a sofa with the Feebs and a couple of glasses of wine. The idiot lovebirds dork at each other before heading to the bedroom to perform unspeakably abhorrent acts.

Meanwhile, Piper, Raige, and the Dolt emerge from the Aerie's elevator and wander through the hallway to Gonzo's door. The ever-useless Elders "refused to confirm or deny that Death wants [Gonzo]." The Dolt interprets Their reticence on the issue as verification that Gonzo's not long for this world. Having thus furthered the plot, the Dolt orbs out as Piper and Raige reach Gonzo's apartment. Raige raps on the door. The near-shirtless Gonzo appears and affably agrees to squeeze the Fun Bags back into their scarlet horror so the gals can indulge in a processing summit. After a moment, Phoebe emerges into the hallway. Piper and Raige drop the Death bomb. Phoebe grunts.

The Chinless Wonder lopes out onto his tiny concrete balcony and leans heavily on my new favorite inanimate object. The rusted, rickety railing of joy throws a couple of bolts.

Back in the hallway, Phoebe receives the news of Gonzo's impending demise about as well as one would expect. Which is to say, she adamantly denies that The Angel Of Death has anything to do with the current situation, berates her sisters for listening to Cole, casts aspersions on the Dolt's ability to guide them through difficult situations, and boots Piper and Raige from Gonzo's apartment building so that she can return to his bedroom to get laid.

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