Charmed
A Witch's Tail, Part II

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Demian: B- | Grade It Now!
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Smells Like Fish, Tastes Like Chicken (Parte Deux)

Darryl and his unfortunate facial hair have been lurking in the background during this exchange, and when Cole ends the call, Darryl attacks him for unethical behavior. Cole's all, "Dude, the adoption went through. Ends? Means? It's all justified. Why so tense? You wanna deep-tissue massage?" Except for that last part, but the Cole-Darryl tension that appeared occasionally last season is back with a vengeance in this scene. Cole must be misreading the unfortunate facial hair. Anyway, Darryl's not there about the adoption; he's there because of the three dusty fisheryokels, and he believes Cole had something to do with it. Cole's indignant. Darryl, the dear boy, actually has to deliver the line, "I'm just a pawn in your twisted scam to win Phoebe back!" Poor unfortunate facial hair. So jealous. Cole again professes his undying, "epic" love and affection for The Feeble One, so Darryl offers him a bit of "friendly" advice: Dump her. She doesn't want to have anything to do with you, so just walk away, Renée. Urm, "René." Cole is sad. By the way, The Ongoing Rehabilitation Of The Colethazor is evident in the altered furnishings in the Casa -- there are noticeably more pastel-shaded tchotchkes and vases and such. Just thought you'd like to know.

Hag Manor, Attic Subdivision. Piper drops what appears to be an ossified owl pellet into a copper bowl. The entire attic explodes. Raige races in, horrified, and extinguishes a couple of small fires before asking Piper what the hell she was mixing up in there. Piper admits she was blending some burdock root with a little eye of newt, which apparently is quite the faux pas in Wiccan circles. Long story short, Raige becomes more and more concerned with Piper's reckless behavior. Oh, and there's also a Threat Of Death in the form of a warning specific to Necron vanquishes in the Book of Shadows, as the last two witches who vanquished Skeletal Demons died in the process. And Piper quotes Patton. The general, not the movie. No, I didn't understand it, either, and neither did Raige. The doorbell rings, and Piper leaves to answer it as the Dolt enters to ask what all the fuss is about. Piper snarks something, slaps him on his bloated Dolt ass, and leaves.

Once she's gone, Raige and the Dolt put their weeny heads together to try to figure out What's Wrong With Piper. So many jokes, so little time. Eventually, they find the Rosie Perez spell scrawled on the wall. Before they can formulate a response, Phoebe bellows from downstairs. Raige and the Dolt gulp.

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Charmed

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