Outside, preadolescents bounce about, trick-or-treating. Two gentlemen in matching Uncle Fester costumes stride toward the manor, but are interrupted by a pint-sized blond ninja, who compliments their outfits. "Cool costumes, dudes!" Aryan Ninja enthuses, and Fester the First unleashes his demon side by pulling some sort of sight-sucking voodoo on the little boy. If I could, I'd have ripped out the kid's vocal cords for the entirely un-ironic use of "dudes" in a sentence, but I'll go along with the sight-sucking for the moment. Into the background squiggles Cole, who, while mercifully not in sailor drag, has apparently chosen to attend the Halliwell Halloween festivities as an "Assistant District Attorney." "What the hell are you doing?" he intones, and Fester the First, without interrupting the sight-sucking, turns to address Cole. "Balthazar?" Fester I asks with surprise. "I use the name Cole here," he corrects, and orders a halt to the sight-sucking. Fester I releases the bucktoothed Aryan Ninja, who scampers away. Not in fright or terror or anything. He just scampers away. A moment for demonic exposition. The Festers tell Cole they've come for the Charmed Ones, Cole asks if the sisters didn't dust the Festers two years ago, Fester the Second explains that Halloween is the time "when the veil between worlds thin [sic]," allowing demons in the know to return for revenge. Cole tells them to get lost, as he's there on a Triad-approved mission, the Festers tell him they no longer answer to the likes of the Triad as they're dead, and Cole monotones, "There's dead, and there's dead," which makes absolutely no sense whatsoever, but damn, that man has some blue eyes. The Festers aren't having it, so Cole squiggles away after noting he'll just "move up [the] timetable" for his cunning plan. Fester I: "I've always hated that demon." Fester II: "Nice costume, though." Demian: "Shut the hell up."
Episode Report Card534 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT