First, a moment of silence in honor of Shannen Doherty. Yes, shes become a walking punchline over the last ten years or so. But I have to admit, in many ways she helped make this show more watchable than it has any right to be. Have fun, hon. And if the rumors about your ouster at the hands of Alyssa Milano are true, I do hope you videotape the smackdown Im certain you have planned for her. Id pay to see that.
Right, then -- the season finale. Unlike every other episode Ive seen, they waste not a second getting to the action. Prue, Piper, and Phoebe burst through the front door of the manor, dragging a bald doctor in a lab coat with them. Pipers fairly certain the danger they face has passed for the moment. Phoebe agrees, as she believes he would have attacked the foursome long before they made it back to the house. The good doctor is confused, and wants answers. The sisters, however, are too busy trying to save [his] life to provide them at the moment. Prue admits to the good doctor that they arent quite sure who is after them. Piper whines about Phoebe not providing them with enough time to figure it out. Phoebe reminds Piper she cant control how far into the future [her] premonitions take place. Prue cuts through the bickering to suggest that Phoebe head to the attic to check the Book of Shadows for more information on the demonic hit man the three are currently fighting. Piper adds that a vanquishing spell would be nice, if Phoebe has the time. She also warns Phoebe not to get sidetracked by the Cole potion, as there are more urgent matters at hand. Upon hearing Coles name, Prue glances over at Piper with a quizzical expression on her face. She waits until Phoebe has scampered up the stairs to ask Piper about it. Piper fills Prue in on the Colethazors excuse for frying Jenna the witch two weeks ago, which as you know is Ian Buchanan made me do it. Phoebe, apparently, is now determined to whip up another batch of Demon Be Gone. Prues surprised to hear this, as shed been led to believe Cole was now firmly in Phoebes past. And where exactly have you been for the last couple of weeks, Prue?
Docs been taking this all in with open-mouthed incredulity. He finally finds his voice. What the hell are you talking about? Yes, Doc. Precisely. Now that he has their attention, though, hes not going to shut up any time soon. First, you tell me my life is in danger, he blares. Then you abduct me from work, and now youre talking about witches and demons? Who the hell are you people? Piper rolls her eyes as if to say, The only problems with saving innocents are the stupid innocents themselves. Prue gives Doc the shorthand version of whats going on. Hes a healer, which means he does good. Either hes already saved too many lives, or hes about to help someone the dark demonic forces sent from the flaming maw of Hell want dead. To prevent this, The Source has sent the aforementioned demonic assassin, a personal lackey of his named Shax. Thats a horrible name, but I expect nothing less from the hax who write these damn things. And that was a horrible joke. Lets move it along then, shall we? Docs had it. He thinks this is all some sort of practical joke perpetrated on his undeserving self by his second wife. Hell soon learn otherwise. Prue begins to explain that the evil theyre up against is very real, indeed. Dr. Griffiths, this is anything but she starts, but cuts herself short when she feels a chill run through her body. She calls for Phoebe as the sound of a raging whirlwind amps up a bit on the soundtrack. Phoebe hollers back that shell be with them in a second. Too late. The DemonCam kicks in as we cut to a distorted shot of the front doors slamming open. The demon -- Im guessing its this Shax person -- zips through the front hall in a tornadic cloud towards Piper and Prue. The cloud knocks the two sisters to the parlor floor, then flares out into the form of the demon himself. Oh, no. With the long grey wig, the grey body make-up, the tattered grey rags hes wearing, and the dead leaves swirling around him, Im waiting for this guy to bust out with the graveyard nightmare number from Fiddler on the Roof. Fruma-Shax here doesnt look bright enough to memorize the words, though.