Animal Pragmatism

Episode Report Card
Owen: D | 1 USERS: A+
Animal Pragmatism

Dormitory. This little Pig Boy is running around naked, squealing that he "needs to eat!" Brunette looks disgruntled at Pig Boy. Rabbit Boy comes out of Red's bedroom, all sweaty-chested, bragging about "another satisfied customer." Ew. Brunette tells Pig Boy to calm down, because Blonde will be back soon with more food. Snake Boy -- Christopher Wiehl -- sits naked on the couch, plotting what the three ani-males should do next. He berates the other guys for "acting like animals." Brunette grits at him that "that's what [they] are." Snake Boy: "Not anymore." He wants to take a "test drive" in his new body. Snake Boy walks out of the dorm room with Pig Boy and Rabbit Boy in tow, despite Brunette's protestations. The passers-by in the hallway all gape at the naked men. Wait a minute -- isn't this Berkeley? Wasn't there a Naked Guy student a few years back who made it a point to go to all of his classes nude? Is this really a big deal on this campus? While I ponder that and leer at CW's defined pecs, the ani-males run into Bedhead, carrying a full laundry basket. They take it from him and push him down to the floor. Bedhead, touching his cut forehead, whines to the ani-males to "try covering up, dude!"

P3 After Dark. Piper stumbles toward the bar, carrying a huge heart-shaped funeral-type rose arrangement. She spots a wee bouquet of wildflowers sitting on the bar in front of her, and wonders aloud, for the radio listeners, who they might possibly be for. This cues Leo "Heavenly Dog" Wyatt to pop up in front of her, and admit that the flowers are his gift for Piper. Although he currently has no identification, money or means of transportation, he wanted to give her something. She tells him she has something for him, too -- his first paycheck "in cash." Leo thanks her, and notes that he's still "working for the Charmed Ones." Is his new job in the bar "awkward" for her? Piper: "What's there to be awkward about?" Just then, Leo spots "Diaper" Dan Gordon walking into the club with an elaborate bouquet of pink tea roses. Leo takes some glasses to the back room. Dan puts down the flowers and (natch) starts to mack with Piper. He reminds her about their plans that night, and she thanks him. As they embrace, he spots Leo coming to the front of the bar. Does Piper have something to tell Dan? Piper LIES and says, "No." Leo walks up. Ruh roh! Piper considers the WWVMD? -- "What Would Valerie Malone Do?" bracelet on her wrist. Piper admits that she "meant" to tell Dan that she hired Leo as a "handyman, bar back, security, et cetera" guy for the club, since he "needed a place to stay." It's "not a big deal." Au contraire, to Dan "it is." He bitches at her for calling out Leo's name at the hospital in the last episode. He asks her how he should react to Leo's presence? Piper "doesn't know," but empathizes with him, and adds that she's looking forward to spending Valentine's Day evening with him. His ego placated, Dan leaves.

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