Outside, Raige smashes through a gate and barrels towards the sidewalk, shouting for Maximum Security Dolt the entire way. Raige takes a digger at the foot of the drive and tumbles onto her hands and knees as Darryl aims his automatic at her head. Maximum Security Dolt orbs in, shoots A Look Fraught With Significance at Darryl and his gun, and reaches for Raige's hand. As he orbs out with her, Darryl's next bullet biffs into the now-empty concrete where the two had stood. Darryl bites his lower lip and squints.
The Hardest-Working Cemetery In Show Business. Maximum Security Dolt orbs in amongst the memorials with Raige, who still doesn't quite get it. She natters on and on about Cole living in the Manor and long-vanquished demons roaming the earth and previously-saved innocents moldering in the cold, cold, ground until something in Maximum Security Dolt's expression shuts her up. "What are we doing here?" she asks, as if noticing her surroundings for the first time. Maximum Security Dolt points to the ground. The camera cuts away to display Raige's own sad and neglected grave marker, etched with her name and the inscription "BORN 1975 DIED 2001." Not. No doubt speechless with rage because her alternate-reality survivors fucked up the birth date on her headstone, Raige gawps at Maximum Security Dolt before vanishing into the commercial break.
And we're back. Maximum Security Dolt reveals he checked with the ever-useless Elders, who confirmed Raige's story. You know, Dolt, if the production staff hadn't blown the budget for tonight's episode on Phoebe's eyeliner, you might have asked Finola Hughes and Jennifer Rhodes, who could have confirmed Raige's story on camera. In any event, Maximum Security Dolt adds that his reality's Raige met an untimely death at the hands of the Source, which is why other-reality Raige can't access her powers. Which makes absolutely no sense whatsoever, but we'll just have to go along with it. Also, does this mean there's a ghostly Alterna-Raige floating around out there? And if so, wouldn't she have noticed that her corporeal double just stomped all over her grave? I mean, I know it would piss me off if my corporeal alternate-reality doppelganger just suddenly appeared and thoughtlessly strolled around on the final resting place of my earthly remains, so I can just imagine what Alterna-Raige must be feeling at the moment. Anyway, Maximum Security Dolt wraps up his expository diatribe by claiming, "If you hadn't sneezed when you did and orbed into the neutral plane, nobody would have ever known." "The neutral plane"? But isn't orbing simply a Whitelighter's method of...oh, fuck it. Raige disagrees with the Dolt's assertion, insisting that Cole altered reality to win back Phoebe. Cole would know whether or not Raige ever existed, and Cole is therefore responsible for her alternate incarnation's death. Does that make any sense? Christ on a stick, but I hate alternate realities. Why couldn't they have done a nice little time-travel episode instead? Maximum Security Dolt offers to assist Raige in any way he can. Raige remarks that while his help is appreciated, she really needs her sisters. "Maybe we can start with two and go from there," Cell Block Piper calls from off-screen. But Raige has only two sisters, Cell Block Piper, so if you started with two, there'd be nowhere else to go. Whatever! I don't care anymore! La-la-la-la-la! Do you hear that? That's me not caring! About the plot holes or the errors in continuity or the gaps in logic or the shoddy dialogue or the hideous clothes or any of it! Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha! Cell Block Piper admits she followed Raige's advice regarding Not Coolio, and she figures that if Raige told the truth about Not Coolio, she might be telling the truth about everything else. Concerned looks all around.