Charmed
Engaged And Confused

Episode Report Card
Demian: C | 1 USERS: C
YOU GRADE IT
Engaged And Confused

Manor. Aftermath. Back in the kitchen, Chrissssty explains that she simply "got a hit" off the demons thanks to her telepathy, but she didn't recognize them from her many years in the Underworld. Raige offers to cancel her ring-buying expedition once more, but Piper's having none of that. She herself is perfectly capable of performing the required research, thank you very much, so Raige is off to meet her fiancé after she drops Chrissssty and The Retard off at The Hagquarters for safekeeping. By the way, lip service is paid to the gals' awareness of Cole's Triad-slaughtering gorefest five years ago, but we never get an explanation for their resurrection. And...scene? Yeah. Scene.

After another flash of white, we're back down in Zar's lair, where the demon of the chamber is pressing an athame against his second-in-command's throat while baying, "How could you fail?" The hench-imp hastens to explain that they didn't fail, exactly, as the desired warning was indeed issued, albeit without the necessary elaboration. "Cyril was incinerated by a Charmed One!" Zar howls, and it's so nice that the attractive and quickly vanquished minion gets a proper name, and yet we still don't know who the hell this hench-imp is, isn't it? CANCELLED! BOO-YA! Suck it, Kern! In any event, the hench-imp quickly fills Zar in on the apparent Manor sitch with regards to Chrissssty and her mad firestarting skillz. Zar, intrigued by the news, determines that Chrissssty is likely The Ultimate Power he heard so much about when he was a member of The Triad, and concocts a scheme to abscond with her from the aboveground. If, as his reasoning goes, he can manage to convince the Ps that Chrissssty was kidnapped by the actual Zombie Triad themselves, the Glamorous Ladies will have that much more reason to kill them.

Back on the Paramount backlot, Darling Henry gazes wistfully through the window of a jewelry store as the employees within close up shop for the evening. Raige jiggles up behind him spouting apologies and excuses, Darling Henry glums something passive-aggressive in return, and the two strike off down the sidewalk in a mutual pedebitch that involves not only their conflicting wedding ideals, but also their clashing toothpaste strategies. Don't ask. No, seriously: Don't ask. "By the way," Raige eventually peeves, "I am not wearing a veil!" "How can you get married without wearing a veil?" Darling Henry flails. "If you want one so much," Raige snaps, "you wear it!" And with that, she stomps out of the frame, Darling Henry blubbering incoherently after her.

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Charmed

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