Exit Strategy

Episode Report Card
Demian: C+ | Grade It Now!
Exit Strategery

Piper replies that his actual year of birth won’t be a problem. She pulls out some tinted Wite-Out and a fountain pen, and alters his birth certificate so the year reads “1974.” She does a little quick math in her head and says, “Wait a minute, that makes you twenty-seven. That’s younger than me.” She contemplates altering the document further as the Dolt gives her the stink-eye. Hon, you should drop your vanity and worry more about the fact that the Dolt looks like he hasn’t seen the business end of twenty-seven in a decade. The Dolt notes that what she is doing is “illegal.” She counters by holding up his death certificate and reminding him that “marrying a dead guy” isn’t exactly kosher, either. Prue walks in behind them and heads straight for the coffee machine. Piper asks her if she was up all night “working.” Prue fills them in on her search for Phoebe the previous evening, then bitches a bit about Cole not bothering to “take three seconds” to squiggle into the manor to let them all know he’s okay. The Dolt notes Cole might be afraid to do so, as “he might get caught.” “Maybe he already has,” Piper snits. Prue looks worried.

Cavern Of The Bi Kraps. Ian enters with the Freak, and the two stride over to Cole. Ian waves a hand over Cole’s head to rouse him. Cole sits up, wondering what happened. Ian admits that he “tried to kill [Cole], accidentally of course.” Ian insists he didn’t recognize the Colethazor in his human form. Cole isn’t buying that, but doesn’t call Ian on the lie. The Freak reveals that last week’s Flaming Ball Of You Will Be Unconscious Now, Yes? was actually a conventional Flaming Ball Of Death. Evidently, the Colethazor is one of the few strong enough to survive an FBOD. Ian slimily begs Cole’s forgiveness and offers his hand, which Cole takes. Ian was Cole’s first demonic mentor back in the day, so of course Cole will accept the apology. Cole moves to some sort of baptismal font to splash a little water on his neck as he asks them how long he’s been unconscious. Ian replies evenly that Cole was unconscious long enough for the Bi Kraps to “investigate reports [he] had gone over to the other side.” “Rumors, not reports,” Cole stresses. The Freak starts to bust Cole’s chops about the Charmed Ones, but Ian puts a stop to it. “It doesn’t matter that you strayed, Belthazor,” he states as he moves to Cole’s side. “Only that you’ve come back.” Ian has a task for Cole -- a task only a demon possessed of Cole’s superior powers could accomplish. There’s a “magical amulet” hanging from the neck of a random San Francisco witch. Cole is to retrieve it for the Boys of Bi Krap. Cole isn’t comfortable with the assignment. Isn’t it a little stupid to send him on such a mission when the ladies of Halliwell Manor are looking for him? Ian disagrees. Should the Ps intervene, it would simply provide Cole an excellent opportunity to kill them as well. Cole straightens his shoulders and asks for the amulet’s location. Ian passes a hand in front of Cole’s face, apparently imparting the necessary information through that gesture. Cole notes that the task should be an easy one, buttons his jacket, and squiggles out. The Freak isn’t sure Cole will succeed. Ian again begs to differ. Cole will manage to complete the mission, but not before he fills Phoebe in on the details, “thereby planting the first seed of doubt in her heart.”

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