Episode Report CardDemian: B | Grade It Now!
YOU GRADE IT
Freer moves on to what we all really want to know: how much of a bitch is Shannen Doherty on the set, anyway? Milano allows her "stock answer" to such questions is that "if we didn't get along, you'd hear about it. I mean, if Shannen Doherty, Alyssa Milano, and Holly Marie Combs weren't getting along, that would be huge news." In the pages of The Star or The National Enquirer, maybe. Milano notes that she was wary of working with Doherty, given Doherty's reputation, but she tells Freer that said reputation has no basis in reality. "At first," Milano insists, "every day was a big slumber party" for the three women, but as their shared time on the series has progressed, Milano, Doherty, and Combs have been spending more and more time on their own between takes. Freer then makes an awkward transition, asking Milano if she has had any real-life "'dirty old man whose wife doesn't understand him' experiences" similar to those of Amy Fisher, whom Milano portrayed in one of the endless series of made-for-TV movies about the psychotic slut from Massapequa. Milano reveals, disappointing regular readers of FHM, that she has "no casting couch stories or weird sexual harassment issues," which she recognizes is "rare" in her line of work. The next segments of the interview deal with three of her co-stars: Sean Penn, Ice-T, and Mark Wahlberg. Freer attempts to dig up the same sort of dirt on Penn she tried to get on Doherty, but Milano does not rise to the bait. Milano asserts she's "never met a sexier man" than Penn, and tells Freer that a month after filming on Hugo Pool ended, Penn approached her at some function or other. "'You were really good in our movie,'" Milano quotes him as saying. Her reaction? "That goes down as one of the greatest compliments I've ever gotten in my life. I shit my pants." Talk to Shannen about how to deal with that little problem, honey. On to Ice-T, with whom Milano appeared in Body Count. Ice-T had a habit of appearing on set with an "entourage" of about seventeen people. Milano notes they were "very sweet people. There were a lot of, like, cousins that he had on payroll." Just for walking around with him? Doesn't sound like such a bad job to me. Then the anecdote that makes me realize being part of a gangsta's entourage might not be that much fun. At one point, Ice-T had to sniper to the ground after being hit by a bullet in the leg. "He took it differently than I'd ever seen an actor take a bullet before," Milano tells us, "so I was like, 'Wow, that was a really cool choice.'" Ice-T leveled his gaze at Milano and stated, "'That is what happens when you get shot.'" Milano: "So I went, 'Oh! OK, so it wasn't really a choice! Nice work!'" Snicker. After a bit where she talks about "stalking" an ex-boyfriend for all of about four hours one evening with a friend of hers, she goes on to discuss Wahlberg. She notes he has "a physical presence" many other younger actors lack. "Most actors his age are weird and androgynous," a statement that makes me think immediately of Leonardo DiCraprio, "but there's something very primal about [Wahlberg]," Milano concludes.