The mirror bubbles, and presently we dive through to land on Phoebe and her ludicrous top arriving late for work. Phoebe's assistant natters something about Phoebe's schedule for the day, then informs her that the divorce attorney called once and Cole called three times. Phoebe, gripping a mug of coffee, grunts and spins to head into her office. Unfortunately for that ludicrous top of hers, she ends up blindly body-checking a blond gent in a grey suit, jostling the contents of her mug onto her chest. Phoebe does not howl and wail in agonizing pain as the scalding coffee raises second-degree welts on the Fun Bags. Instead, she catches sight of the gentleman's face and horns up. Flirtatious introductions follow. The gentleman's name is "Adam Prinze." Feel free to bludgeon yourself with the nearest blunt object. Lord knows I've already done so at least eight times this evening. Freddie Prinze Charming Junior is played by Sean Patrick Flannery, and I'm compelled to note that Father Time has not been kind to Young Indiana Jones. He looks like a blond David Cassidy, and anyone who's seen Keith Partridge lately knows this is not a good thing. Shame, really, because if Freddie Prinze Charming Junior lost a bit of the bloat around his face, he'd look enough like Michael Vartan for me to be able to call him Kink Arthur, thereby sparing me the pain involved in typing out a "joke" dependent upon Sarah Michelle Gellar's butt boy. Prinze Charming makes with the profuse apologies, and offers to spot Phoebe for the dry-cleaning. Okay, so the guy's a blind Keith Partridge. Rip the hideous thing off of her and burn it, Freddie. No, wait. Scratch that. I saw enough of the Fun Bags last week. In any event, it turns out that Prinze Charming is a devotee of "Ask Phoebe," which surprises the column's purported author, as her "target audience" is made up of "closeted housewives pining for love." "Well," Prinze Charming grins, "one out of two isn't bad." He's a closeted housewife? Kinky. Not as kinky as Janice and Ralphie, but still.
Episode Report CardDemian: B+ | 378 USERS: C+
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