Is There A Woogy In The House?

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: B | Grade It Now!
Get Down! Woogy Oogy Oogy!

In the living room, Professor Manners is babbling about how well the Manor's been restored when Prue makes her belated appearance. Phoebe comes out with the tray, and as she announces "Duck. Medallions..." she uncovers it to reveal a live duck, which quacks. Phoebe finishes, "...sans medallions." Hee. Luckily, Professor Manners laughs, and Prue tries to join in with a silly comment. Claire, as you might imagine, is unamused, and Prue and Phoebe surreptitiously exchange wicked side-eyes. I told you this episode got better.

Piper's kitchen difficulties continue. Phoebe creepily appears behind her, and asks what's wrong. Piper gets distracted by the sink clogging, and asks Phoebe to call a plumber, but Phoebe's more interested in the knife she conjures into her hand. Piper whines for someone to kill her now. Phoebe: "Ask and you shall receive," and even on that pitfall of a line, La Milano injects it with just the right degree of quiet menace. Piper's life is spared, however, when Josh calls into the kitchen, prompting Phoebe to get rid of the knife in a cloud of Woogy-smoke, which is a nice touch that I forgot to mention earlier. Piper bitchily asks Phoebe to escort Josh out of the kitchen, and with her attitude, it's no wonder the only guys interested in her are, well, dead. Phoebe, looking thrown by her brush with killing her sister, obeys.

Professor Manners takes this opportunity to tell more about the spiritual nexus, but Demian's already summed it up really succinctly. Apparently the nexus is equidistant to the five spiritual elements, so it's a place of great power. The power blinks off for a second just as Professor Manners says the word "power," like, ha ha, not, and Prue adds, "Power failure," just in case we didn't get the "joke," like, THANKS, and I find myself thanking Phoebe again for putting an end to this nonsense when she tells Prue that Piper needs her in the kitchen. Her eldest sister sufficiently distracted, Phoebe offers Professor Manners "the grand tour." Heh.

As an aside, since I mentioned the episode where Cole taps into the power of the nexus, it's worth wondering why he didn't release the Woogy in doing so. Of course, it's possible that the Woogy was intimidated by Cole's steely eyes and pouty lips and supple...whoa, my original train of thought is halfway to Duluth. Where was I?

Oh, right. Joy. Prue comes into the kitchen to find Piper literally squealing while sitting on the floor and kicking her feet like a toddler. Sorry, Season One Piper fans, but this is why I am not one of you. Anyway, Prue and Piper have a tiresome argument about the house and Phoebe, and luckily Claire pops in to request a word with Prue. Oh, and she almost turfs it over the duck. And in case you wondered? Quacking is comedy gold. Prue tells Claire she'll be with her in just a minute, and when she's gone, Piper tells Prue that she can't come up with dinner, and it's too late to get any food from [72virg=ins]. Prue decides to cut their losses, and Piper agrees. Sounds like a typical Charmed writers' meeting. The elder Ps vacate the kitchen, allowing Phoebe to sneak in there with Professor Manners. The Prof says she doesn't need to see the basement, but Phoebe isn't having it, saying that it's "the best part of the house." She and the gas man definitely did it.

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