Love's A Witch

Episode Report Card
Demian: B | Grade It Now!
Never Was There A Tale Of More Woe!

Closing travelogue, now with cable cars! Over at the Manor, Phoebe's locked herself in the attic and refuses to emerge until she's composed a successful spell to block her sisters' emotions. To that end, she's scribbled out the following, which she recites with as great a deal of hope as one would expect from her:

In the name of the Halliwell line
Bar my sisters from this power of mine.

Nothing happens. Raige, who had been pounding at the attic door, orbs into the room with Piper and Big Gay Chris, and the Clamorous Ladies immediately start in with the bitching. Big Gay Chris rolls his eyes and falls onto a nearby sofa in irritation. Part Check: It gets a pass this time, as Big Chris has changed his clothes and has therefore, presumably, showered since his last scene. "Come on, Phoebe," Piper pleads. "None of us like this new power of yours any more than you do." You can say that again. Raige suggests, "How about, if instead of trying to control your power, you try to -- I don't know -- control yourself?" Whee! I hope this escalates into a full-on fistfight, because I really want to see them smack Phoebe down for, oh, everything she's done since the third season. I'm left disappointed once again, of course, but that's to be expected. Big Gay Chris finally breaks his silence by rising to his feet with, "I don't get it. [The Dolt] didn't give you the empath-blocking potion?" Clever Gay Chris. I do love you so. Piper immediately bellows for her useless ex-husband, who orbs into a room full of women shrieking for that crimson vial he stole from his son. He tries to argue that Phoebe's new power is a wonderful gift and they should learn to work though their current zzzzzzzzz. The ladies are as weary of his babbling as I am, and demand that he hand over the potion. He reluctantly passes it to Piper, who wastes no time guzzling down half the bottle. She slides the rest over to Raige, who finishes it off. After a moment, Phoebe enthusiastically shouts, "Nothing! Nada! Zilch!" And there was much rejoicing. Raige airily blows on out of there to finish her pinochle game with Granny Healy. Remember her? Yeah. Neither do I. Phoebe rises to escort her sister down to the front door. Big Chris turns to Piper and asks, "So, it worked? No nausea, no queasiness?" Piper's all, "Nope. Nothing," and breezes out of the room. "Looks like we're one big happy family again," Big Chris smugs at the Dolt. The Dolt shakes his head and glowers, "You're not family," before turning on his heel and following Piper down the stairs. Big Chris shrugs, all, "I'll show you, Dad," and draws another vial of the potion from his jacket pocket. He uncorks it and downs it in one gulp.

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