Charmed
Charmed

Episode Report Card
Owen: D | 374 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Pardon My Past

Halliwell Manor. Night. A party is coming to a close. Prue "Frederick's of" Halliwell, clad in a backless brown suede boob-sling dress, shows some departing guests to the door. The extras thank her effusively (natch) for a "great party." Piper "Tie: Beaux" Halliwell, in a black tube cocktail dress, walks into the parlor while carrying a tray of coffee. Prue beams at her, because their fete is such a success, and thinks they "should do this more often." Whatever, Prue. Piper does this at her nightclub most every night of the week -- this is a busman's holiday for her. Piper bitches at Prue that the next party's guest list should be "trimmed by one" and looks over at Leo "Dan's Fever" Wyatt, who's talking to Dan "If the Glove Fits" Gordon. Prue explains that when she went to get supplies at the club, Leo was there, so it would have been awkward not to invite him. Piper: "Doesn't Leo feel awkward being around Dan?" Prue: "Doesn't look that way to me." Cut to the guys, tightly gripping their -- ahem -- long-neck beers and chatting enthusiastically with each other. Prue expositions about Leo being mortal now and not knowing anybody. Hello, can we have a "Previously on Charmed" segment each week to get rid of these stilted explanations at the beginning of each ep? Oh, wait, that would mean that the writers would have to pay attention to continuity and actually create stories that arc throughout the season. Never mind. Piper's still mad, but explains to Prue that she's not angry with her sis, but "upset with the whole situation." Prue: "Doesn't Leo accept that you and Dan are together?" Piper: "Of course." Prue then gets Piper's goat by hinting that the guys are discussing Piper. The hard Ps titter, and Piper looks nervous. Just then, Phoebe "Freakin' II: The Entity Boogaloo" Halliwell, in a kimono-type pajama top, appears on the stairs. She wails on her sisters to "give it a break -- it's after midnight, and [she has] midterms tomorrow." Piper apologizes. Prue invites Pheebs downstairs for a study break. Phoebe can't, because she has "too many phobias" -- to learn! Yuk yuk yuk. Not. She's studying for a "psych" exam, and starts naming off terms: "claustrophobia, arachnophobia . . . phallus-phobia." I don't even know if that's a real condition, but I suspect it might be a real shout-out to my "Johnny Wad" recap. Prue quips weakly, "Relax-ophobia?" Phoebe beams and exclaims, "You!" as if her sister has said something exceptionally witty. The hard Ps agree to keep the noise down. Besides, the "party's breaking up" anyway. Phoebe blows them kisses, thanks her sisters and heads back upstairs. Piper glances over at Dan and Leo.

Charmed

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