Lester the Possessor grins grimly as his minion smears out. The Retard arrives at a bank. We know it's a bank because the building plainly says: "BANK." Sort of like my favorite Demianism, "the Mausoleum's Mausoleum." I can't tell you how long I snorted over that one while riding the bus to work. Inside the BANK, we hear Henry explaining, "And he starts working for Anderson Aviation on Monday, he'll be training pilots. It's a great job, yeah. More than enough to make those payments." Ah, Ivan, remember when you were on a little show called Jack and Jill? I seem to recall Sars posting in the MBTV forums that you were "hotter than the damn sun." Can't say I disagree. Henry and some pathetic parolee in a wipeable blue blazer sit pleadingly in front of a loan officer. "Yes, Nick flew helicopters in the war," Raige affirms, as we pan over to see her sitting severely upright in her chair in a filmy black shirt, which just seems a tad too formal for this sort of occasion. Although at least she gets that something about these proceedings should be formal. I mean, would it have hurt Henry to ditch the dusty-looking leather jacket he wears to hunt down parole-jumpers and put on a suit for his parolee? And as for Mr. Product-Placed Iraqi Vet, how about some dress blues? Or even khakis? I'm just saying, a uniform could go a lot further than wearing a checkered button-down under a poly-blend jacket that looks like it was forced on you in a stuffy "jacket required" restaurant. "Right," bald loan officer says, "and this was before he went to prison, correct?" "That's correct, sir," Product-Placed Iraqi Vet says, finally speaking on his own behalf, "but it was only for a year, and it wasn't for anything really bad." Henry explains that Product-Placed Iraqi Vet just needs to get some cash together so he and his son can move to a better area of the city. A better area of the city? Haven't they heard that EVERY neighborhood in San Francisco is "up and coming"? Both Henry and Raige are there to vouch for him. "And who are you again?" Loan Officer asks. Raige is a friend and someone who believes in "second chances." Oh, barf. If that gets him the loan, I'm not ever recapping this show again. Oh, wait... "Especially," Raige adds, "For those who served our country." Oh, BAAAAAARF! I mean, I get the whole respect for the troops and shit, and I do respect them. I respect them for doing a job I probably wouldn't be able to do. I respect them because both my father and father-in-law served in Vietnam. I don't, however, currently respect their commanding officers or their Commander-in-Chief. Nor do I particularly like having this "these colors don't run" BULLSHIT crammed down my throat on a network that tells me a "fresh" episode is "JUST MOMENTS AWAY!" ["Actually, this is fairly inoffensive, comparatively speaking." -- Sars] Loan Officer agrees with Raige and toddles off to run a credit check. Product-Placed Iraqi Vet whimpers that no one is going to loan money to an ex-con. Henry and Raige proceed to fluff the unfortunately-dressed man. At this exact moment, the Retard comes barreling in to complain about her small little life. Hey, bitch? Did you serve in Iraq? No? Then SHUT THE FUCK UP! I know that was an unfair question, but I just hate her maggoty, segmented, vacuum tube neck so much. Back at the Manor, Phoebe attempts to baby-talk through the Psycho's bloodlust, but he's more interested in "playing" with his G.I. Joe action figure. The Psycho and the rest of us ignore Phoebe as she talks about how sad everyone is that the Dolt is currently being shelved next to Mrs. Paul's Fish Sticks in the Angel of Destiny's freezer. Finally, Phoebe takes Crusty Ted, whose eyes are freakishly close together, and pretends to talk with him. Psycho makes a grab for the bear, but Phoebe prizes G.I. Joke from the Psycho's sticky little hands and casts a spell over Crusty Ted.
Episode Report CardKeckler: C- | 479 USERS: B-
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