Hear my call, hear my cry,
Spirit from the other side.
Come to me, I summon thee:
Cross now the Great Divide
And knock the living shit out of that stupid cameraman who's standing out on the sidewalk.
What? It could happen. Anyway, Raige insists The Retarded Bimbo clean up the mess she made of the attic, leading The Retard to snit, "Can't you just cast a spell and make it pick itself up?" "That would be something called Personal Gain," The Lippy Spastic snaps back, "which is something we don't do." Except on all of those many, many occasions when Personal Gain is exactly what you do do, right, moron? God, I hate this show. Raige also argues that the less magic used in the Manor, the better their chances of remaining under the demonic radar, if you will. "Oh, okay, yah," The Retard snides, "three chicks living under the same roof. Hello! How dumb can they be?" Pretty fucking dumb, Retard, as anyone who's watched this crap from the beginning could easily tell you. Almost as dumb as you, in fact. The Spastic babbles out some tedious lecture about respecting The Craft, or something, that The Retard completely ignores. The bags under The Lippy Spastic's eyes grow increasingly agitated as the disembodied voice of Phoebe groans, "Hey, don't look at me. You're her Whitelighter."
The camera cuts to Phoebe's office at All The News That's Fit To Fuck Me, where the knockered nitwit in question sits at her desk applying lip liner with the help of a compact mirror, the better to expose the ineptitude with overdubbing that Alyssa Milano shares with nearly all of her fellow cast members. Anyway, long story short, Phoebe cuts short the call when Vex Pexter arrives in the outer office for a chat, and Vex Pexter, after much belabored flirting, invites her to his art show. Well, his "art" show. Lord, but that was a pitiful scene last week, wasn't it? And yet I'm certain I'll carry with me to my grave his "I was flying over Africa, looking out the window and painfully aware of the struggles below me and yet I was up in the clouds feeling peace" justification for that assy piece of trash he showed The Cooter Tat, won't I? This stupid show. I swear to God. In any event, Phoebe accepts the invitation by placing an over-familiar hand on his shoulder, hurling herself into a full-color premonition in the process: Vex Pexter's tawdry little "art" show is completely destroyed in a minor earthquake. Hooray! That premonition was almost as satisfying as the various premonitions detailing Gonzo The Chinless Wonder's violent death. Phoebe dates the biggest losers, doesn't she? Including Vex here, who responds to Phoebe's typical bout of orgasmic gasping and shuddering while receiving a vision of the future by rather limply wondering, "What happened?" "The earth moved," Phoebe quips. Oh, my God! Was that a shout-out? I think that was a shout-out! Aw. They really do pay attention to these recaps! Thanks, guys. But I'm still giving this episode a D.