Not!warts. The camera pulls an entirely unnecessary spin through the apparently empty library before settling upon a table. Raige pops up from behind the thing to gulp, "I think it worked!" and why she and her sisters were cowering behind various pieces of furniture is beyond my capacity for understanding, so let's just gloss over all that and get to the point where Raige congratulates Phoebe for remembering the Woogy-B-Gon spell, which is also asinine, as Phoebe of all people should have that damn thing tattooed onto her brain by this point, so let's skip ahead further to the point where Piper cautions, "We can't just keep casting it because he's going to figure out a way around it sooner or later," and...no. No, he won't figure out a way around it, because it's the fucking Woogy-B-Gon spell, and it always works no matter who is in possession of the Friggin' Woogy at the moment, and all of you suck and deserve to die. Oy. The gals gather in the center of the room to strategize, with Phoebe insisting Piper take the lead on the whole thing, as Piper's "the only one who still has any confidence around here." "Yeah, well," Piper deadpans, "that's just because I'm a good actor." Shout-out? It has to be. And as if to prove the point that Holly Marie Combs is the only good actor present, the next line is Mugs McGowan's to deliver, which she does so badly that I'll ignore her entirely in favor of listening to Phoebe bitch, "If [Zankou] succeeds, then everything we've done in the last seven years means nothing!" I'm not touching that one. It's all yours, gang. Phoebe calms herself a bit but still adds rather forcefully, "I'm not willing to live with that." "You might not have to," Piper eyebrows, a little too jokingly given their current situation. "Then we go down fighting!" Phoebe cries, and considering her sordid history, you'd think she'd avoid using the phrase "we go down" in any context, but you'd apparently be wrong. Raige refocuses her sisters' attention on the issue at hand: How are they to defeat Zankou when he controls both the Book and the Manor? Phoebe puzzles over this for a moment before stumbling across a cunning plan. As the only thing Zankou wants more than the Friggin' Woogy is a trio of dead Glamorous Ladies, they need to draw his unwelcome attention away from the Nexus and onto themselves. If they manage to divert his energies to attempts on their lives, the thinking -- such as it is -- goes, they might buy themselves enough time to recover the Book of Shadows. "It just might work!" Raige agrees. Piper begs to differ. "Unless he kills us first," she notes, tossing her head around to level her gaze upon her lippy bastard of a half-sister. Raige puckers.
Episode Report CardDemian: F | 365 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT