Charmed
Charmed

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1182 USERS: B-
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The Three Stigmata Of Chrissssty Retard

Manor, and my, but this is a pointless scene. Mikelle's had the sort of sad and difficult life we've come to expect of the losers The Ever-Useless Elders choose for future Whitelighterdom and, while Sara Downing is playing it all with a sort of wry detachment that is fairly enjoyable to watch, who the hell cares? CANCELLED! Shouldn't the typewriting crackmonkeys be gearing the rapidly dwindling audience up for The Ultimate Battle To End All Ultimate Battles, rather than wasting screen time on tedious storylines we've already seen at least fifty-nine times in the last eight years? Whatever! Long story short, Raige gifts her soon-to-be-dead charge with a little pep-talk until they're interrupted by the arrival of Phoebe and Piper, who burst through the front door in mid-fight. "Why didn't you just freeze them?" Phoebe groans. "Because it wouldn't have worked," Piper needlessly reminds her before lighting into Phoebe for keeping the latter's meeting with The Ultimate Retard a secret from the other Glamorous Idiots. Phoebe castigates Piper for "starting a war" as Mikelle, quickly grokking to the fact that she's simply getting in the way by remaining in the Manor, rises to leave. "A little help?" Raige bleats. Piper distractedly flicks a wrist in Mikelle's direction, halting the soon-to-be-dead charge in her tracks before refocusing her attention on the Feebs and glaring, "There. I froze somebody. Happy?" Well, I'd have been happier had you flicked a wrist when it really mattered, doll, but thanks for the concern. Not. Raige drags her bickering half-sisters into the center parlor for a mini processing summit, the upshot of which is this: Piper insists that the full Power of Three is necessary to stop Ssssecretly Evil Chrissssty and Maggot Neck, stupid Phoebe's still not convinced that The Sisters Retard need stopping in the first place, and useless Raige remains on the fence. Raige and Phoebe flee in different directions, leaving Piper alone to brood until the screen flares white yet again to shoot us back over to...

Charmed

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