Charmed
Charmed

Episode Report Card
1170 USERS: B-
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We Don't Need No Water, Let The Bimbo Retard Burn!

...an alleyway in which Simon Mocks and ANNOYING! Basically, he's sitting off at a distance from the main action and telekinetically manipulating a length of rebar in a fencing match with Darling Henry, who must of course fend for himself the old-fashioned way by swinging his own length of rebar around with his hands. Needless to say, Darling Henry is a battered and bloody mess, but I suppose the special effects in this sequence are fairly well done, and that's what we're supposed to be focusing on at the moment, and not the fact that the pommy little shithead is coming awfully close to killing Raige's boyfriend by knocking him around with a piece of iron. Raige screams for Simon Mocks to knock it off, so Simon Mocks of course slams the rebar into Darling Henry's head once more before TKing him violently across the alleyway, where he lands at Raige's feet. "Got him right where I want him," Darling Henry gamely huffs at Raige's shoe. Raige guhs as Darling Henry pulls himself to his feet to address the -- in his words -- "pompous son of a bitch" at the other end of the alley, and I was going to transcribe it until I realized it's a horribly written and clichéd monologue that only works because it's Ivan Sergei delivering it. So, long story short, Darling Henry proves that Simon Mocks doesn't know nearly as much about Raige Matthews as he himself does, Raige and Henry profess their love for one another, Henry decks Simon Mocks in the jaw, and Raige sends Simon Mocks back "across the pond" with a dismissive flick of her telekinetically orbing wrist. "Told you I never run from a fight," Darling Henry reminds Raige. They goof off each other for a moment before we head back to...

Charmed

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