Suicide Boudoir. Chrissssty, who'd apparently fallen into a deep sleep in the last two minutes, gasps herself upright and awake on the bed. "You can't stop them from coming!" she whimpers, and I realize Marnette Patterson's had little to do thus far this evening aside from catatonically rocking back and forth, but I can already tell from those tiny bits combined with this tense little freak-out on the bed that she's a far better actress than Kaley Cuoco. Thanks for nothing, Charmed. In any event, the Retard, who'd leapt to her sister's side, asks, "When? When are They coming?" The camera pushes hard into Chrissssty's face as she spits, Manson Lamps a-blazing, "Now!"
And They, apparently, are a turkey and cheddar sandwich on white bread, which is what the camera cuts to immediately after Chrissssty's pronouncement, because this show is ass, and I want to die. Actually, we've jumped down to the dining room, where Pack Mule Piper is preparing lunch for her lazy bastard of a half-sister, said lazy bastard of a half-sister's latest slampiece, and her own sociopath of a son. Darling Henry asks the following egregiously dumb question: "So, how long does it normally take for demons to attack?" About as long as it just took for my previous estimation of your intelligence to plummet from "sentient" to "imbecile," Hank, which would fall roughly into the area of a nanosecond. Piper, far more polite than I am, simply replies that it could happen any time, but the demonic types do tend to wait until it's terribly inconvenient for the Glamorous Ladies, because they're evilly inconsiderate like that. And wouldn't you know it? Barely have those words left Piper's mouth when Maggot Neck and Chrissssty come tripping down the stairs, with the Retard shrieking, "Incoming!" as they go. "What is it?" Raige calls out. "They're here!" Chrissssty shudders, and with that, the two speaking demons from the earlier torture scene squiggle in to the center parlor with a hooded underling. The Retard pushes Chrissssty to the floor as Torture Guy -- whom I'm just going to call "Kiefer" until told otherwise, which will be never, because he's never given a proper name in this episode and even the Internet Movie Database's dedicated Charmed-heads have given up following this awful show, so no help there, either -- conjures a Flaming Ball Of Death in his gnarled Chris Of The Spider Woman claw. Maggot Neck violently TKs both Kiefer and his primary henchdemon to the far side of the center parlor by flinging out both of her hands, and yeah, they're using the same TK sound effect they did when Shannen Doherty flailed around the set all those many years ago, so you can start howling in outrage right now. By the way, she managed to knock either Kiefer or his main Kieferette right out of one of his boots, just so you know.
Darling Henry bolts for cover while The Dead Eyed-Psycho orbs himself up to his nursery. Meanwhile, the hooded underling flings a Flaming Ball Of Death at stunned Chrissssty's head. Piper quickly deploys the Hands, and the underling instantly vanishes in a spray of flame and dark demonic bits. Raige takes on the underling's FBOD itself, flicking a bit of orbing telekinetic mojo at the thing with a twist of her wrist to redirect it against a wall. Unfortunately, her timing and aim are a little off, and the FBOD whizzes past Maggot Neck's massive and hooting reflexive dodge to glance off Darling Henry's left shoulder before taking out a few vases in the dining room. As Darling Henry crumples to the carpet with a smoking gash in his shoulder, Chrissssty, still on the foyer floor, screams, "No!" while pressing her fingers to her temples in twue Fiwestawtew agony, instantly setting the couch before her aflame. Kiefer and the henchdemon rise to their feet to squiggle out as Raige kneels at Darling Henry's side, the Retard lifts Chrissssty from the floor, and Piper calmly retrieves a fire extinguisher from the hall closet to douse the blaze in the center parlor. "What's going on?" Phoebe cries from the lower landing, where she's just arrived from the nonexistent attic. "Ask the firestarter," Piper rather frostily enunciates as the camera pans past her to take in the Retard's grimacing embarrassment. Chrissssty guiltily drops her gaze into the commercial break.