Establishing shot of that crushed cocktail waitress's apartment building, which has been magically rehabbed into office space in the last four weeks. They really had no budget for stock footage in the first season, did they? The camera takes in a sign that reads "Halliwell Rossen & Haas, Attorneys At Law" before cutting to the office's occupant, a husky, middle-aged legal type who likes to double-bill his clients. I think they included that last detail so the audience wouldn't mind so much when it came time for Fabio to kill him. Oops. Spoiler! Fabio blinks in, determines that the double-biller is "Arnold Halliwell," learns that Arnie is an only child, and snaps Arnie's neck with a little purloined TK. And...scene! Oh, sorry. Fabio makes a stoopid joke about lawyers, as well. You don't want to hear it. No, really. No. Really. Okay, fine: "Lawyers are. [Pause.] [Pause.] [Beat.] [Pause.] Still the same." I warned you.

Manor attic. Phoebe's discovered a drawing of Melinda Warren that I have to believe is a later "reinterpretation" of what Melinda might have looked like as imagined by one of her many, many descendants, rather than a contemporary portrait. The thing is all soft edges and gently-smeared chalk shadings, and it looks like a 1970s print ad for a feminine hygiene product. I half expect the woman in the drawing to leap to life to ask me about my problems with freshness. Piper, meanwhile, has stumbled across something far more worthwhile in an ancient vellum-bound tome. "Because the warlock had stolen her love," Piper reads, "she cursed him into the pewter heart where he could spend eternity knowing the sting of betrayal. The legend says the warlock must never be freed, or he will destroy the Warren line." Piper arches a brow. "That would be us." Well, yeah. You and God knows how many other people scattered across North America, but those people aren't in the opening credits, so screw 'em, right? The ladies bust Prue's chops for letting Fabio out early, then fret about how to defeat him.