Charmed
There's Something About Leo

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There's Something About The Dolt

I bet you were just wondering what the lingering partygoers were up to at the moment, weren't you? Let's listen in: "Sit. Sit. Stay. Sit. Sit. Sit. Sit. Sit. Stay. Stay. Sit." I really hope they're talking to the stupid fucking dogs.

Straight Estates. Li'l Bulging Brody yanks open his apartment door just as Raige was about to knock, and there's a little bit of boyish apologizing from Brody that exists only to set up the drastic and deadly attitude shift he drops through when Raige reveals that the Dolt's now an Avatar. Phoebe clatters in shortly after said shift has occurred, in time to watch Brody disappear into a closet. (Must. Not. Make. Going-back-into-the-closet. Joke. Must. Remain. Strong.) Brody retrieves a small metal case from its hiding place above a false ceiling as Phoebe's cell rings. It's the Doormat, and he's useless, so let's hang up on that particular distraction as quickly as Phoebe does and get back to the matter at hand. Brody opens the case to reveal a small alabaster bottle. "What is that?" Phoebe guhs. "It's a potion," Brody seethes, clearly off his rocker, "to KILL AVATARS!" He swipes his automatic from the end table and barrels out of the apartment as Phoebe and Raige gape and gawp and mug their collective way into the next commercial break.

Oh, and now the clean-up begins. And they still haven't locked those fucking dogs away to facilitate things, so someone just dropped a stack of dishes out in the living room because one of those fucking dogs jumped up on him. "NO! That is a NO! Are you listening to me? I said that is a NO!" Dude. The dog? Doesn't speak English. SHUT UP. Dimwit motherfucker.

Manor. Li'l Bulging Brody bursts through the front door and charges through the ground floor in search of the Dolt, with Phoebe and Raige trailing limply behind him. There's one piece of the ensuing stupidity I'll note, but only because I believe it becomes a plot point in a later episode. Phoebe scoffs at the Avatar-killing potion's effectiveness, because, you know, if non-magical Brody never killed an Avatar with it, how does he know it works? Brody, crazed, rages that he knows it works because the Avatars murdered his parents in a failed attempt to destroy it. His parents, in discovering the potion, also uncovered "a battle that happened over five thousand years ago over our very future." Like I said, store that information away for future use, because it's never again addressed tonight. There's some more LOUD ARGUING about the matter down there in the main hallway before Raige and Phoebe convince Li'l Bulging Brody to remain where he is, while they head upstairs to wrangle the Dolt themselves.

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Charmed

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