There's Something About Leo

Episode Report Card
Demian: B | Grade It Now!
There's Something About The Dolt

Nonexistent Attic. Piper stands at the city map with a scrying crystal and Kevin's slave bracelet while the Dolt putters around in the background with the potion ingredients. Raige and Phoebe storm into the nonexistent room from the upper stairs and SHRILL! and SHRIEKING! and BRODY! and EVIL! and POINT! and COUNTERPOINT! and Phoebe, you ignorant slut. Long story short, Piper's starting to buy the Dolt's load of crap about the Avatars' true intentions, and obstinately refuses to listen to her sisters' objections because, as she growls, she "need[s] to vanquish demons. Again." She grabs the slave bracelet as the Dolt grabs her other hand, and together, the two orb up towards the ceiling. "Now what?" Phoebe sighs. Raige bobs her bosom up and down by way of response.

Hell. The Sokols' hot leader tosses an equally hot underling up against a metal cage and demands to know why the underling alone survived the recent attack by Kevin 'n' Brad. The underling frantically vows his ignorance in the matter and his undying loyalty to the group and wah, but he's toast anyway. What's fun is the totally awesome way the Sokol's hot leader dusts him: The guy conjures a Flaming Ball Of Death which he then shoves whole into the hot underling's mouth. Hee! The hot underling's cheeks bulge as the FBOD quickly gets to work and, after a bit of the shaking and the shuddering, the hot underling explodes, head first. There's even a bloody chunk of bombed-out hot underling that somersaults through the air for a beat before vanishing in a puff of black smoke. Ha! The brutally hot Sokol leader then turns to address a quartet of not-as-hot underlings, but what he says matters not, for Piper and the Dolt arrive shortly thereafter to waste them all with mighty Hands of Discontent and massive sprays of sporking electricity. Actually, it's way more than a massive spray of sporking electricity. In another well-done effects shot, the Dolt thrusts his hands towards the floor, and the bolts of white light that shoot from his palms collect in front of his feet, only to rear up in a ceiling-touching, earth-shaking wave of fire that that blasts through the chamber to overwhelm the few remaining hotties who escaped Piper's Hands. It's pretty cool, actually, even though you know the Dolt is totally showing off for Piper's benefit.

A beat passes after the screams of the damned dissipate. Piper, casually impressed: "What was that?" Heh. "All, uh, part of the package," the Dolt stammers. "That was a lot of power," Piper notes, approvingly. The Dolt then ruins the embarrassingly amusing subtext going on in this part of the scene by blathering endlessly again about the Avatars' intentions and I DON'T CARE because WE'VE BEEN THROUGH THIS ALREADY. Oh, and look at that. It's over.

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