Beloved spirit Angela,
I seek your guidance.
I ask that you commune with me
And move among us.
Nothing happens. Revenant Ben shouts for the bailiff to have him inform the judge that they've reached a verdict. Tanya offers to hit the lights as The Wop rises to stretch. Phoebe babbles out the spell once more in desperation. Meanwhile, Piper cracks open the door to The Toilet Of Justice and twists her hand in the direction of the United Colors. All of the jurors freeze. Piper enters to rip Phoebe a new one for exposing them all as witches to the California court system. Phoebe splutters that Stan Stan The Salmon Man is being "persecuted" for having the same power of premonition as she, and she can't let him go to jail. Piper shuts her up with the revelation that she and Raige will help her summon the dead bookkeeper. Raige and the Dolt are surprised to hear this. Piper proposes that the Dolt sprinkle "magic dust" on the United Colors Of Jury Duty after they've rendered a verdict of not guilty, thereby wiping out their short-term memories. "Magic dust"? Jesus. The Tinkerbell association will only further the assumption that the Dolt is a little light in his loafers. Raige wonders why the Dolt doesn't use this power of his more often. He explains that "magic dust" (snerk) is reserved for only the most dire of situations, as one has no control over which memories one is erasing. The dust recipient might forget something important yet unrelated to the memory in question, such as an appointment or a birthday. Piper overrules the Dolt's reservations, as she "cannot live with [the United Colors] knowing [their] secret, knowing that at any minute [the Ps] would have to relive the hell [they] went through with [the Late Lamented]." The Dolt ponders this for a moment, then agrees.
Piper, Phoebe, and Raige clasp hands and recite a longer version of the earlier summoning spell:
All Three:
Hear these words. Hear our cry,
Spirit from the other side.
Come to us; we summon thee.
Cross now the great divide.
Phoebe Alone:
Beloved spirit Angela,
We seek your guidance.
We ask that you commune with us
And move amongst us.
A cold wind blows through the room, signaling the dead bookkeeper's imminent arrival. Piper, Raige, and the Dolt quickly retreat to The Toilet Of Justice. Once there, Piper twists her hand around again, unfreezing the United Colors. The jurors snap out of it just as an ectoplasmic haze spreads out in the air above the circle of candles on the table. Presently, the spectral presence of the late Angie Provolone appears. Long story short, she confirms Stan Stan The Salmon Man's version of events. The United Colors Of Jury Duty rest their respective jaws on the floor. Angie disappears. Smash cut to Revenant Ben proudly announcing "Not guilty!" in the courtroom. D.A. Almay breathes, "Unbelievable," looking for all the world like she's ready to brain Juror Number Eight with a pay phone out in the lobby. Stan Stan The Salmon Man bows his head in gratitude. Out in the gallery, Piper instructs the Dolt to "dust 'em," with Raige reminding him to include the bailiff in his sprightly little escapade. Stan approaches Piper and Raige as Phoebe sidles over from the jury box. He thanks them for their help. Piper notes that his dead ex-wife did all the hard work; they merely facilitated her appearance. Phoebe encourages him to develop his "gift." Stan bulges out his right eye and screams, "Wanna see what I can do with my new TEETH?" Okay, not so much, but if Daria, God forbid, ever becomes a live-action movie, this guy has the part of Demartino nailed.













Comments