Chuck

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Farmer Franco's Prize Cow Daisy

Since Alexei doesn't know that Chuck is Frost's son yet, and that Chuck would not let her get hurt no matter how confusing and hurtful she is, they can totally play hardball with her safety and scare him to death. So while they're worrying about that, Casey and Morgan run into each other in the ductwork and do some explaining of everything so far. Morgan is hiding or maybe trying to save Jeffster (why?) and Casey is looking for the override so they can kill all the bad guys with computer guns, and Morgan gets a gun again, points it at his head again, Casey gets to hiss muzzle! again. Only this time, Morgan's wearing workout gear, making it all fabulous again. Turns out he's a guy, under all those cheap suits.

Carmichael threatens Frost with "very bad things" and Volkoff's amazing reply is to wheel out a giant beeping Sputnik-looking thermite bomb that is terrifying and will apparently raise the temperature to 4000 Fahrenheit degrees: "Metal will boil. I'm gonna drop it down the elevator shaft, and it will incinerate every single one of you, including my beloved Frost." Alexei has won the threatening game for sure.

Morgan steps on a bunch of tacks and gets caught by bad guys, but then Casey saves him, and shoves Morgan into a closet with the stolen phones, which takes his mind off things, but then they take Casey, so we went from two good guys to no good guys. Chuck and Walker bring out Frost and apologize for starting shit, and then Alexei makes the sensible call of pointing a gun at Chuck's head, so Frost has to admit finally that Chuck is her son. Alexei does this sort of triple-take thing that was fairly cute as performed by the ensemble, but I can't figure out a way to describe it that's funny and not annoying, so let's move on.

Hugs for Frost, kiss on the lips for Chuck -- hey, smoke 'em if you got 'em -- and suddenly Alexei's playing Mom's Boyfriend and inviting himself to Thanksgiving at the Awesomes'. (Which is the second time my brother was like, "Seriously? This isn't a dream episode? I'm not high right now? This is happening?" Sometimes, kid.) Alexei does this whole "I can't have a relationship with your kids?" thing and she's like, "My kids work for the CIA. It's more about how you are a literal supervillain and less about whether you're boyfriend material."

But they've been working together for 20 years, right? And she never once gave it up? (To Timothy Dalton? Who is at least as hot at the age of eighty-seven as he was when he was forty?) And still she keeps him on the hook? (Frost indeed!) That is some lore right there. That's even better than being a spy. Do all the spy shit in the world, sure thing, but dicking around with Lex Luthor's brain for twenty whole years? That's power, my friends. That is worth learning more about. Is there a Prague training program for that shit? Because if so, my whole plan to marry Julian Assange just got about five steps shorter.

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Chuck

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