At Castle, Chuck -- looking slim, toned, and rather smokin' in a tight black T-shirt -- fills the rest of the team in on the mission: to access Bale's PDA and get onto his party guest list. Notice how Chuck's filling the General Redhead role in this scenario (this will be important later). Their mission is basically to get to his phone, which won't be easy. And getting past the password will be even more difficult. Because the phone will have its own bodyguards, apparently, Casey will be the one going for the phone. Chuck says Morgan will distract Bale's squash partner while Chuck matches up with Bale in squash. That way, Bale will get to know him so he won't be a complete stranger at the party. Everyone else agrees that Chuck can't play squash, so Morgan will have to "zoom on squash," says Casey, and Chuck will have to take on the distraction task.
Cut to the athletic club, where Chuck's giving Bale's squash partner a big, greasy massage (he likes it deep and hard, y'all) while Morgan pretends to be Michael Carmichael of Carmichael Industries, a subsidiary of MichaelCo. Bale thinks that sounds like a lot of money, and Morgan agrees that if he were standing on his wallet, "I'd be tall." Chuck continues to massage the giant muscley squash partner (whose name is "Killer" Burnham, by the way, because he killed nine people in the Foreign Legion), while Casey hacks his way into Bale's BlackBerry. Problem: Casey gets caught so Sarah calls in Chuck. He pulls out a tranq gun to take his guy out and go help Casey. But the guy who caught Casey happens to be an old friend, also working the private sector. For "a turd named Bale. A real scuzzer. But at least it's a payday." Killer's already caught Chuck and his tranq gun. Chuck fills Killer's chest up with tranq darts, but he's 400 pounds of solid meat, so it doesn't do a think. And when Chuck finally gets him down for a half-second, Chuck's hands are too greased-up to open the door and escape. Morgan, meanwhile, asks Bale if he knows what Morgan should do with $40 million lying around. Sarah comes in at the end of the match, and Morgan introduces her as "Bunny Doll." Morgan and Sarah get a personal invite to the party from Bale. Casey busts in and gives Chuck the good news: Morgan, THE INTERSECT (in case Chuck or any of us forgot), saved the day.