Cut to the Buy More, where Lester's singing Fortunate Son, for no other reason than that we love Lester and Jeffster! and need them to sing. They sing and dance, with the BuyMorons dancing along. Downstairs, the Ring guys wonder what the noise is, and one of them says it's the Buy More employees' revolution. Oh, and the good news for the Ring: They found Agent Superman's files on the Ring and uploaded it to headquarters. Uh-oh. That's bad bad news for our guys. The bad news for the Ring is that Colonel Casey made it into the Buy More. Diedrich says that's not bad news if he's dead. Lester keeps singing and throws in some hip thrusts in case we weren't sufficiently grossed out by him on a regular basis.
Casey can't get his security access to work, so he's puzzling by the lockers when they open and knock him over. Because he's Casey, he bounces back quickly and fights the two bad guys who came to kill him. He's not doing great until Jeff walks in all high on chloroform. He keeps telling Casey to peace out and make love not war, and offers him a hit. Then he says the fighting's not cool and jumps on the back of one of the Ring guys, and chloroforms him. He tells Casey to fight the power, and deliriously walks away (but only after Casey gets to tell him to "peace out"). The lockers close, though, and Casey can't get in, so he takes off running. Presumably back to the Orange Orange, where Agent Superman is telling Sarah that it's time to use Castle's self-destruct since the files are there and they can't risk the Ring getting that information (uh, too late). Sarah begs him to give Chuck fives more minutes. He fights her on it, but apparently likes her enough to listen to her pleas.
Downstairs, Chuck's finished his story: "That's it, that's how it happened." So now he has this Intersect in his brain, and it's not working. Morgan wants to know just one more thing: Is Sarah Chuck's beard? Is the whole relationship fake? "Cause, uh, Buddy, this is awful." Chuck: "Why? Cause we never had sex?" Morgan: "You never had sex with that girl?! ...No, it's terrible that you have to pretend to be in a relationship with someone that you clearly love." Chuck says that he and Sarah are over, but Morgan says he's not. "You're a good liar, Chuck, but you're not that good. You lied to me for three years, but I always knew you loved that girl. I saw the way you looked at her. We all did." He asks Chuck to tell him he doesn't love Sarah, and Chuck tells Morgan he's right; he does love Sarah. He kept telling himself he didn't, but he clearly does. (Is this the first time he's admitted it, really, to anyone?) He tells Morgan he has no idea how badly he needed to get this off his chest and thanks him. The Ring guys come back in to kill Morgan and Chuck, and Chuck finally, just in the nick of time, flashes. When they un-handcuff them, Chuck beats the crap out of them. He's assisted by Morgan throwing him a stick to fight one guy, and then, in the end, when Chuck's going to fight Diedrich and his sword with his bare hands, Morgan bonks him over the head with a stick. It's awesome. Then Morgan says Chuck's like Bruce Lee, Van Damme and Seagal all rolled into one. "That's my best friend!"












