The Swiffer boys are back in the Army barracks. My god, they love their barracks.
[Note on the following scene: Marvell talks in a mumbling, indistinct dialect that at one point gets so thick that Heather and I literally had to go back and turn on closed captioning just to understand what was going on. Just a warning. We're here to translate and enlighten.] In the hospital, Price brings with her a very elegant-looking man in a black leather jacket, Artiss Embry, who is here to educate Marvell on the ways of fatherhood. Marvell moodily says he doesn't want to be a father and they should let Cheron take care of it. Artiss says he can put Marvell in a program, help him get his G.E.D. and get him on a job in six months. Sound brilliant, right? But Marvell doesn't bite. True Marvell quotes: "You out yo damn mind" and "Three hots and a cot, huh? Hey, we all gotta do our time." Don't ask me, I'm just transcribing. Artiss knows that Marvell's dad ran out on him and that Marvell's been gangbanging. Artiss makes a convincing argument, but will Marvell take the bait? We'll just have to wait and see.
One man who's not worried about having three hots in a cot right now is Patterson, who's being prepped for surgery. Doctor McShyster and Turner come in. Turner has on his lucky impotency-fighting brown Kufi hat. They put the gas mask on him and ask him to count backwards from one hundred. "One hundred hots in a cot," he begins, "Ninety-nine hots in a cot..." as he gets sleepier and sleepier. Turner and Patterson hold hands in a supreme act of male bonding.