City of Angels
To Halve Or Halve Not

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The King And Eye

If you've stuck around this long, you may already know that this is part two of a two-part City of Angels consecutive-night ratings stunt. Only because of the show's low ratings, calling it a stunt is a little shady. It would be like seeing Evel Kneivel jump over a Buick using a stepladder and some Air Jordans and calling that a stunt.

Previously on City: Ossie Davis pretended he was a king when really he's a schizophrenic homeless man with a bad case of gangrene in the legs; Dr. Williams asked Dr. Ana Syphax out to a hip salsa club. While there, they spied her former flame, Dr. Ben Turner, shaking his booty with his new love, Dr. Lilian (Vivica to her friends) Price.

We open on a night sky at the hospital, and then the glare of an exam lamp and then Dr. Williams walking purposefully to the ER. What was that all about? Is that to signify that even in our darkest hour, Williams is our ray of light? Hardly. Williams goes to examine a young Asian woman who is having stomach pains. (Dear CBS: Another minority? Wow, you guys sure do know how to make a point.) Wesley Williams rules out appendicitis and thinks it could be a womanly infection or some bad food. The woman reveals that she ate sushi the night before, and Williams says that could be it. She asks if she can leave the hospital, and Dr. Williams leaves it up to her. She moans about an early class and says she wants to leave. The nurse who looks just like Tempestt Bledsoe from The Cosby Show looks on disapprovingly. When Williams is done, Tempestt asks if he shouldn't have checked with the attending physician before discharging the woman. Wesley "No Longer a Wuss" Williams repeats his earlier findings and comes to the same conclusions: He is so right. "I don't know. She looks sick," Tempestt says. Oh, nurse, please spare us your medical lingo! Despite this empathic, psychic call, they let the woman go home.

Next thing you know, a big, burly man who looks a little like John C. Reilly in Magnolia is carrying what looks like an old sack of potatoes in a blue shirt. It turns out that sack of potatoes is hospital director Ed O'Malley and he's holding a bloody rag to his head. (Perhaps somebody tried to twice-bake him?) Dr. Williams and Tempestt Bledsoe lead O'Malley to an O' bed and do an O'xamination. An extra asks the burly guy, who is wearing a Secret Service suit, to leave. He says, "No. I stay here." O'Malley turns his head and he looks like he got his ass kicked, except his face got in the way. He is bloody, bruised, cut and swollen, as if he somehow made Richie Aprile from The Sopranos very upset. "Call Ben Turner," he moans, "I'll only talk to him." We cut immediately to the opening credits.

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City of Angels

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