Commander In Chief
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You Can Be Such A Pain Sometimes

The next morning, Mac walks into the kitchen, where the family is eating breakfast at the table. There's some cuteness with a donut that's not even worth recounting, except that Becca ends up snapping at Amy, "You know, you can be a real pain sometimes." "Yeah, and you're a virgin," Amy replies, with the know-it-all tone of having no idea what she said. Hilarious freeze-frame with everyone holding forks halfway to their mouths! Amy: "It's...in your book!" It turns out little Amy had the diary all along, and has it with her now, at the table, no less. Because there wouldn't be anything noticeable about a bright pink flowered notebook in her hand. There's more child hilarity when she asks, "Horace, what's a virgin?" and one by one, the family hustles out to avoid the inevitable Let's Explain Sex to the Six-Year-Old But Not Really conversation. Mac tries not to laugh, and leans in to say that the book is Becca's private diary, and that Amy's not supposed to read it. Amy cutely says she's sorry, Becca stomps off, and I take a break to brush my teeth, since I'm starting to get cavities from the little one.

Back at the office, Vince ushers in Keaton, and they make small talk about his last visit to the White House. Keaton then blurts, "You an Arab?" Vince is hilarious, looking surprised, but calmly says, "Palestinian, sir." Keaton looks at him and, in Arabic, replies, "I empathize with your people." Vince is clearly unsure of what to do, and finally stammers that he's sorry, but that he doesn't speak Arabic. Hey, Democrats can act like presumptuous jackasses too! This is an equal-opportunity show! Keaton just looks amused and gives Vince an atta-boy pat on the shoulder, saying, "Tell her I'm here." Mac is in the Oval Office, and tells Vince to give Keaton a second and then bring him in. She takes off her reading glasses and stands...and flashes back to the Vice-Presidential debate.

In The Past, Mac assures the crowd that the income tax will not be raised, and that Social Security will remain intact: "Those two goals are not mutually exclusive, and that's where General Keaton and I differ." They smile at each other, very polite. The next question goes to Keaton, and is "What do you feel in your heart you will bring to the ticket of Governor Crawford? Why'd he pick you?" After a weak joke about his wife saying the same thing, he begins on his credentials, which include West Point, serving as a soldier, leading troops, and working with the UN on peacekeeping missions: "I know how to lead, and I know what's good for this country." He continues, "Hell, Governor Crawford didn't pick me. His team picked me. The governor has no military experience, and some people say he's too liberal. So I help him on the John Wayne Front. Folks, that's what politics is. We are there, to help our guy get elected." He gestures to Mac: "Mackenzie Allen -- she was picked because Teddy Bridges needed help with the soccer moms. Everybody knows that's why we're here." The crowd mumbles, and Allen is asked for her response. She looks amused, yet put out. Mac: "And all this time I thought I brought the John Wayne factor." She flashes Keaton a confident smile...

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Commander In Chief

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