Be Cruel to Your School
Returning to the library, Jeff is shocked to see four new members in the study group, all invited by Abed. They are: Pierce (the medallion-wearing old person mentioned in the speech), Shirley (the middle-aged divorcee), Tony (the remedial teen, still wearing his letterman's jacket) and Annie (another teen, but apparently a highly organized one), who wants to know where Jeff is board-certified. Britta is gone, and Jeff excuses himself momentarily, taking his jacket and textbook with him. Moving quickly down the steps, he finds Britta, who only left to have a smoke. He suggests they skip the study group and get dinner, but Britta convinces him to try and tutor the people he considers "untutorable." As they go back inside, it's clear he plans to make them as untutorable as possible.
Back in the library, Pierce introduces himself to Jeff as the owner of Hawthorne Wipes, maker of moist towelettes. He then introduces everyone as offensively as possible, including "Abed the Arab," "Troy the Wonder Boy," "Princess" Annie and Shirley, whom he apparently has the hots for. Annie is upset she wasn't invited to the group originally, and yells at Shirley for her platitudes. Jeff sees this rift and asks them to address it, in order to preserve the integrity of the group. (Or, y'know, make it implode). Shirley more or less threatens to put Annie's head through a jukebox, and Pierce touches Shirley's hair in a creepily reassuring way, so Jeff encourages Shirley and Troy to point out that that's sexual harassment. (Pierce: "That makes no sense to me. Why would I harass somebody who turns me on?") Annie reveals that she went to school with Troy, and Troy realizes that she was the student expelled for drugs, Little Annie Adderall. Annie retaliates by revealing that Troy blew his scholarship by dislocating his shoulders while doing a keg stand. The group descends into a shouting match, broken only by Abed reciting Bender's Christmas speech from The Breakfast Club. ("Smoke up, Johnny!") He manages to work a Dirty Dancing quote in before Jeff gets a call form a deep-throated Duncan; he leaves, and the bickering resumes.
Outside, Jeff wedges himself into Duncan's Smart Car and is handed a manila envelope full of answers -- almost. Duncan has wised up and demands Jeff's Lexus in return. (Well, we know he made decent money, anyway. Why isn't he using more of it?) Duncan offers the use of his Smart Car along with the answers, and Jeff nearly walks away from the deal before angrily accepting.