Cougar, Cougar, Burning Bright

by Zach Oat September 24, 2009
Fall Pilot Season: Cougar Town

Behind the glass of the school office, the principal holds the sign and pantomimes beating someone, although we can't hear what he's yelling about. Jules marches Travis out and tells him to get his stuff. Bobby walks up, and Jules can't believe that they called him, too, but no, he's just here to interview for a groundskeeping position. Travis hears this and is thrilled. Pulling into the driveway at home, Travis tells Jules that junior high kids are stealing her signs to pleasure themselves with, and Jules is flattered. Travis tells Jules that he wants his mom to be normal, and Jules tells him she just wants to live her life, and that violence doesn't solve anything. They're screaming at each other, and Travis storms inside as Grayson walks up and tells Jules that he's gonna have issues when he grows up. She shoves him, hard in the chest, and he falls over. "Who shoves people?" Upstairs, Travis leans his head out the window, and sing-songs, "Violence doesn't solve anything, Mom!" Jules screams back, "Get back in the house!" and the window slams. Jules then gives Grayson her speech about how it's tough to be a 40-year-old woman. Nobody wants them, that's all life will be. Grayson says his grandfather got a woman pregnant when he was 90. She shoves him again.

At the house for sale, the home-buying couple signs some papers as Barb says the deal is going through. She shows Jules her plans for plastic surgery, stretching her face to look like she's skydiving, then congratulates her on her conquest the other night. Outside, Jules laments to Laurie, "I'm one of them." A cougar. Then they see the junior high kid stealing one of the signs. He sees them and freezes, and, trying not to spook him, they remove their shoes. He bolts, and they chase him through bushes and down the street until he runs into a house. Knocking at the door, Jules and Laurie ask to speak to the woman's son. His room is covered with pictures of Courtney Cox and her cleavage. Jules tries to relate to him, telling him how she knows it's hard to be a teenage boy. Cut to school, where Bobby pulls his riding mower up to Travis' lunch table, and calls him "little man" before putting his headphones back on and driving off playing air drums to "Slow Ride." Back at the kid's house, Jules tells him not to steal any more signs, and to spread the word.

In the driveway of his house, Grayson takes a picture of himself wearing footie pajamas with his arm around another college girl. He's clearly going to send it to Jules. Someone has a crush on her. But he's still going to go have sex with that girl, who apparently isn't weirded out by the footie pajamas.

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