CSI: Miami
Ashes To Ashes

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Horatio's manning the command board in the skybox while Alexx labors on his flash-fried victim below. Horatio asks Alexx, "What do you see?" Alexx tartly replies, "It's what I don't see -- any broken bones." Horatio notes that the victim may have been drinking, and the pending tox screen will tell. Alexx continues, "I've seen drunks so looped they fall out of a car doing sixty and don't break a finger." She then begins checking passages; Horatio resituates his monitors so he can supervise further. Alexx notes that there's soot in the woman's lungs; Horatio concludes, "So she was alive during the fire." "I hope you didn't suffer too much, darling," Alexx tells the body. Horatio interrupts this moment of compassion for the victim by saying, "Alexx, if she's going to help us, we need to know who she is." And she's going to have an "if found and autopsied, return to [your name here]" label stamped on her liver? Alexx picks up a brittle, burned limb and notes caustically, "Can't get prints from bone." I note that she appears to have freshened her makeup in solidarity with Calleigh. What is it with this show? Both Khandi Alexander and Emily Procter are lovely women, and whoever is running the make-up department is just oblivious to this. I realize it's Miami and every self-appointed style expert in North America loves to point out how Floridians are into the bright feminine colors, but this goes beyond the boundaries of regional style and into an uncharted territory of excess. Ahem. Back on the show, Alexx dumps out the stomach contents to try to draw a timeline between last meal and time of death, and something goes clank in the metal pan. She tells Horatio, "You're not gonna believe this," and he zooms in, just in time to see Alexx extract a diamond ring from the mix. Alexx says, "Looks like she ate about four carats for her last supper."

Horatio takes this information and...does not run with it. Instead, he goes to Delko and says, "Check for [this woman's] dental records and you're going to come up dry." That's not all that's dry -- so was the woman, as she had not a drop of that $400 cognac. Instead, she had 15 micrograms of Demerol, an amount that shouldn't be ingested by anyone other than seasoned professionals (*cough* *cough* Liza Minnelli *cough* *cough*). Delko also notes that the woman tested high for folic acid, which, in a normal universe, would indicate a fondness for vitamin supplements. In this one, however, it means she was seven weeks pregnant. Delko declines to explain how folic acid levels correlate with specific weeks in the human gestation cycle. We all know pregnant women are supposed to take a lot of folic acid to prevent neural tube defects, but I can't find any citations linking folic acid levels to a stage in early pregnancy. The closest is a citation supporting the theory that folic acid levels in pregnant women are an indication of a pregnancy's intentionality (Knowledge and use of folic acid by women of childbearing age---United States, 1995 and 1998. MMWR 1999; 48:325--7) -- but that still doesn't provide a link between the chronology of a pregnancy and the level of folic acid in the woman's system. Note to show runners: bring the science, but for heaven's sake, at least check the science first.

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CSI: Miami

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