CSI: Miami
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Episode Report Card
Sobell: C+ | 5 USERS: A-
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Horatio Caine, Judge and Jury

Another day passes, if the sunrise we see on the Miami shoreline is anything to go by. Inside the CSI compound, Horatio's blathering on about how Thomas's DNA matches the semen sample taken after Judy's rape. Speedle tells Horatio, "She wasn't the only one. There were three other victims." Horatio's taken aback: "Three others? Were they robbed?" Speedle confirms that they were. Horatio muses aloud while Speedle hangs out and tries not to squeal like an *NSync groupie over being allowed in the room while Horatio's thinking: "Danny Blue said Thomas was working on a scheme for the better part of a year, right?...It's my guess that he was making his living as a thief, but getting his power from the rapes. Medical examiner confirms that none of the women had been raped vaginally. All sodomized." Speedle picks up on it: "And he tells them if they go to the police, he'll come back to get them." I presume that means he'll rape them again, this time vaginally. Horatio declines to elaborate, thank God, and continues, "So his scam could be that he threatened his victims into silence." "Maybe one of the victims turned the tables on him," Speedle suggests. Horatio replies, "That's possible, isn't it. The question becomes, who?" Speedle points out that the other victims left Miami after filing their police reports. Horatio's all, "But Judy Johnson stayed behind and did what? She stayed behind and killed herself." We confirm that Mr. Johnson's alibi checks out, although not conclusively. Speedle sums it up nicely with, "We can nail a grieving husband for killing his wife's rapist. That's good." That's the old Speedle. Did you manage to fight your way into briefly controlling the body now occupied by Grasshopper? Do you need an exorcist? Speedle concludes, "I think the guy deserves a medal, don't you?" I like that Speedle's turning Horatio's rhetorical flourish back on him. Don't you?

In Canvas, Calleigh is scraping the paint off the wall while Parker -- whose accent seems a lot more noticeable all of a sudden -- implores her to be careful. Delko muscles in and asks, "Would you rather we take the whole thing back to the lab for processing?" Give the man a warrant and he's giddy with power. Someone shouts, "That won't be necessary," and Caribbean Queen introduces us to Vincent Graziano, legal counsel for the club. He's all, "Take note, we are cooperating with your investigation." Calleigh replies, "It's funny how warrants bring out the best in people." And the power-mad martinets in Delko and Calleigh. Graziano produces a list of VIP members and a list of employees. This leads directly to the discoveries that Benito Ramon was on the VIP list, and that Michelle Carter did work at the club. Don't those beater boys feel like chumps now? We get a few gratuitous shots of Michelle getting paint all over her barely-clad body, and then Delko says, "If Michelle was an employee, that would make Jarrod a liar." And a gaper, by the looks of him. Graziano assures Parker that he has nothing to hide, and now, with his accent hovering around Antonio Banderas levels -- seriously, y'all; I went back to the twenty-two-minute mark where we first met Jarrod, and he had only a mild accent, and now, a mere fourteen minutes later, he sounds like he was coached to say his lines phonetically -- anyway, Jarrod explains that when the police came to investigate, he decided that lies and obfuscation were the quickest way to make this problem go away. Jarrod Parker is clearly not the strategist in his business partnership.

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CSI: Miami

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