CSI: Miami
Grave Young Men

Episode Report Card
Sobell: C | Grade It Now!
These Kids Today, With Their Guns and Corpses

Well, we can't really tell now, so we might as well focus on where Rena's going next, given that she apparently has license to roam freely around a crime scene where the techs are working away. She comes over to Speedle -- somewhere in transit, she also picked up a giant cup of tea -- and purrs, "Do you have any questions for me?" "Yeah. What are you using on your hair? I love the curls, and there's no frizz. Is it shampoo? Do you use a silicon finishing serum?" Speedle asks. Actually, he comes close, commenting on her ticky-tacky manicure with, "Why do women do that to their nails?" The ticky-tacky in question is a set of long white talons with little gold stars on the tip of the index fingernail. Rena tells him it's to attract men, which she emphasizes by petting Speedle like a cat. Speedle gives her hand a look and tells her to take herself and her tea to someplace other than the crime scene. I ask the room at large (the husband and two indifferent cats) what she was doing running around the crime scene in the first place.

Speedle heads over to the body, where Alexx gives him the 411 -- the guy ran marathons, and she thinks he may have had an enlarged heart or some other cardiac weakness. Speedle begins rattling off respiratory hypotheses: asphyxiation, sleep apnea, being smothered in your sleep by Rena Sofer. Well, he doesn't do the last one, but it's not like she's behaved in a way that makes her appear at all innocent. Alexx immediately tells us why someone might favor smothering someone in his sleep: "It's almost impossible to distinguish accidental from homicide. Result of closing off the air to the windpipe's the same." As Alexx speaks, Rena drifts into the frame and watches her, very obviously monitoring what the CSIs are doing. We get a TMIcam shot of what suffocation entails, and Alexx narrates: "Blood stops carrying oxygen to the alveoli. I'd say he fell asleep in his pillow if I hadn't watched Miss Thing put her suave on Vin Ethanol earlier." Speedle smirks slightly, then turns to look at Rena, who smolders back in his general direction.

Back at the A-plot, Pete's ushering Horatio into Jeff's room, assuring him that he hasn't touched a thing. Horatio and Delko get Pete out of the room by asking him to put on that pot of coffee he offered earlier, and then the shut the door and proceed to rifle through the kid's stuff. Among the finds: a drawer with Newsview magazine, the cover story featuring a collage of clip-art guys (stockbrokers, football players) and the headline "New Technology: Horizontal Drilling." I love the prop publications. Horatio uncovers a bottle of Three-in-One oil; Delko informs him that it's used to clean guns. Delko then flips through Newsview -- I immediately note that the paper stock seems to be too expensive for a weekly -- and he discovers the publication Weapons of Death hidden within. I have a feeling that NRA members are probably bashing the remote into their forehead right now as they keen, "Gun owners aren't all delusional militia nuts! They're not! Those magazines make us look bad!" Horatio, meanwhile, is rifling through Jeff's laundry and asking it, "What do we have here?" What he has is a tee reading "Four Twenty Boyz" in a stencil font. Horatio guesses that the name links up to getting high. Over at the desk, Delko (who's now flipping through Soldiers and Commandos), asks how someone so obviously un-street as Horatio would know that. Horatio replies, "My brother worked narcotics undercover." I give a moment of thanks that, insofar as we know, Gil is an only child and Catherine's sister is alive, and I don't have to deal with constant references to My Dead Brother on that other show.

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CSI: Miami




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