4 x 4

Episode Report Card
Sobell: B+ | Grade It Now!
Fantastic Four

Liam and Sara are processing the scene, and Liam is getting all philosophical with, "No matter how hard you work to get big, there's always someone bigger." Sara comments, "It could be what keeps them going. Like Freud said, 'Anatomy is destiny.'" Liam would like to know if Freud had any non-contextual quips validating Liam's theory that the murder weapon is one of the weightlifting bars. No, but Sara's going along with the hypothesis anyway. She natters on, "The killer didn't even have to be the same size. All they needed was the right weapon, some leverage, the element of surprise…" Liam is ignoring her in favor of flexing in front of the mirror.

Cut to David the Droll Coroner telling Emergency Backup David, "Victim is a well-developed male. Musculature appears hypertrophied." I love his gift for understatement. He then asks Emergency Backup David if he'd like to guess on the COD. Emergency Backup David suggests, "Blunt force trauma," and David twinkles, "Absence of bruising." Emergency Backup David recovers: "Maybe it was a post-mortem blow." The two prepare to find out.

Meanwhile, Liam goes poking around Paul's bedroom. Shockingly, it's devoid of reading material. In the top drawer of the nightstand, Paul had stashed a gun. Liam photographs this. In the bottom drawer, Paul had stashed his 'roid supply. Anyone who's surprised, you're fired.

Sara's in Paul's "office," or, to be more precise, his shrine to himself. Paul didn't think of his body as a temple so much as he thought of it as a sort of mobile Sistine Chapel, if his reclining pictures are any indication. Sara's flipping through Paul's appointment book when Liam strolls in to announce, "Nine-millimeter in the bedroom, and syringes next to the bed." Sara's all, "Wow." You're fired! Liam smirks, "The vic was putting the 'smack' in 'smackdown.'" Well, you can't spell "lame quip" without "Liam," can you? Although it's weird that he sees a syringe and thinks "heroin" in a bodybuilder's house. Sara takes this time to point out that there was no blood on either the poles or the weights.

The coroners continue their autopsy. Shockingly, they find evidence that Paul may have been injecting steroids. No! And then they make the really cool, really gruesome discovery. After David notes, "Left eye socket appears swollen," he presses down on it, and out oozes all this black, oily gunk. Emergency Backup David looks alarmed as only an X-Files fan can.

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