CSI
Blood Lust

Episode Report Card
Sobell: B+ | Grade It Now!
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Beware the best intentions

This episode opens with Radiohead, which means that it's already got a B simply on musical merit alone, and then we see an aerial shot of the Strip with the Flamingo, the Paris, and the MGM Grand visible in the distance. Rest assured that sandwiched between the Paris and the MGM Grand is the Aladdin, where I spent last weekend. Insofar as casino hotels goes, it gets points for having a bathroom larger than the kitchen in my apartment, and for having the kind of tub where you can stretch out, maybe do a little yoga, and still keep everything submerged. These criteria are important: the only nicer hotel bathroom I've had in Las Vegas was in the Mandalay Bay, and frankly, for what those rooms go for, it had darn well better be nice.

But we're not here to talk about tubs -- we're here to get our freak on with Radiohead. Get your freak on, y'all. We switch to a residential-looking street in Vegas, where the cab driver Rajeeb Khandewahl is discreetly checking out the attractive woman in the backseat. He then turns down the radio -- goodbye, Radiohead -- and the woman takes the opportunity to comment, "Last time I was out here, this was all desert." Khandewahl replies, in perfect, unaccented English (this observation is important later -- I'm foreshadowing here), "One day, I'm looking at a cactus, the next day, a mini-mall." Khandewahl asks what brings the woman out, and as she replies, "Work," she looks up and sees a kid stumbling into the crosswalk. She screams, "Stop!" and Khandewahl slams on the brakes with sufficient force to send her rocketing into the back of his seat. The sound of the brakes screeching is enough to attract the attention of a bunch of bikers gathered outside the neighborhood watering hole. The wheels of the car stop on the kid -- unfortunate, that -- and the cab comes to a stop. Cue twelve angry, drunken men preparing to come over and give the crisis the benefit of their collective wisdom. Khandewahl checks on his passenger, then heads outside to see how the kid is. Short answer: disemboweled. That's not usually what happens when you're hit by a car, unless you're an extra in Death Race 2000. The cabbie takes one look, then heads back towards his cab. Reason # 3,456 why I would never make it as a successful member of an angry mob: I assumed Khandewahl was going to take advantage of the dispatch radio to log the accident and call for help. These folks assume otherwise, and fueled by wrathful ignorance, they proceed to beat him senseless. I'm not going to bother giving a blow-by-blow, as it were; just suffice it to say that it's a barbarous spectacle.

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