CSI
Fur And Loathing

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Aaron: B- | Grade It Now!
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Yiff-A-Dee Doo-Dah

Cut to later, with Gil and Catherine examining all of the confiscated costumes, which are now hanging on racks. They're sniffing each of them to try and find ipecac and civet oil, and Gil of course takes this as an opportunity to lecture about pheromones. Then he adds that most mammals only copulate seasonally. Catherine thinks that would get pretty boring. "For some," replies Gil, without missing a beat. "The rest of us know how hard it is to afford a good dominatrix on a civil servant's salary." They eventually locate a wolf costume that's covered in the episode's signature scent. "So I guess we're looking for a wolf," quips Gil. "In wolf's clothing."

And I guess they found him pretty quickly, because Gil is interrogating Mr. Wolf in the very next scene. Wolfie admits to rubbing the ipecac and civet oil all over "Sexy Kitty," because he was pissed at Rocky and knew how much Rocky liked his big blue cats. "What did Rocky do to you?" asks Gil. "He's a raccoon," answers Wolfie. "They're all low-lifes. I mean, what do they do? Screw…eat garbage…screw some more." Hey! Don't you dare demean my lifestyle like that! I personally find there's nothing more relaxing than a nice post-coital snack of used coffee grounds and overripe bananas. Which may explain why most of my relationships don't last very long.

Wolfie further confesses that Rocky stole his girlfriend (one "Linda Lamb") at last year's PAFcon. "And I just knew," he continues, "that since Sexy Kitty was Rocky's fave, he'd have his filthy raccoon mouth all over her again this year. All I wanted to do was make him sick enough so he'd have to go home and stop cheating on my mate." Gil points out that Linda Lamb is actually his "ex-mate," and Wolfie reluctantly agrees. "I just couldn't take seeing what that wanna-be marsupial put her through," he adds. Heh. "Wannabe marsupial" is just funny for some reason. Probably because it makes me think of the Spice Girls in kangaroo costumes, which may be yet another reason why most of my relationships don't last very long. When pressed for details, Wolfie further reveals that Linda was the one who turned him out into the plushie scene. So does that make him her animal prag? The scene's big climax comes when Wolfie reveals what everyone who has actually been paying attention since the teaser already knows: that "Linda Lamb" is actually our old pal "Have Another" Sherri Lewis. Dun dun DUH!

This sends Gil and Catherine scurrying back to check out the wrecked car from the teaser. They pop the trunk, and discover that Linda's lamb costume was there the whole time. "Evidence without context is not evidence," pontificates Gil. Except for the part where Rocky was in a big giant animal costume as well, which definitely seems like "context" to me. "So she didn't just hit Rocky," realizes Catherine. "She knew him." "For the philandering raccoon he was," agrees Gil.

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CSI

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