CSI

Episode Report Card
Sobell: B- | 841 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Plump Fiction

Hey! There's a guy buried underground and a team ostensibly racing to save him. So you know what would ratchet up the tension right now? A bunch of celebrity cameos at an unnamed restaurant. Wayland Flowers' Madam is hanging out with Sam Braun and the late impressionist Frank Gorshin, along with some arm candy teetering perilously close to her freshness expiration date. Oh, wait -- that's Tony Curtis. Aieee! Anyway, the guys all jawjack and it has nothing whatsoever to do with the case, so I don't see the point in transcribing it.

Catherine comes thundering in to rain on all this irrelevant merriment. She tells Sam she needs to talk to him, and the blonde says, "He's already got someone to talk to." In Catherine's best move of the night, she tells the blonde to zip it, and repeats her request. Sam introduces everyone with, "I'd like you to meet my daughter. Catherine." The blonde now has an oh, shit… look to go along with the kilo of mascara she's wearing. Sam gets up, and the two of them stand and chat at the periphery of the restaurant in which this scene is set. Catherine says, "One of my guys has been kidnapped. I need a million dollars in cash, in large bills, and I need it now." Sam says, "Let me guess, Mugs. The department won't pay the ransom." Catherine drops her eyes and says no. Sam gets a tough edge to his voice and asks, "Why should I?" Catherine takes a breath and tries to muster equal toughness: "Considering the problems you've had with the law, you could use some good publicity." Sam's not buying: "Do I look like a man who needs publicity?" Yes! You're having lunch with Wayland Flowers' Madam! Sam tells her, "If you're coming to me like a cop with a tin cup in your hand, the answer is no." Catherine pauses for only a moment before saying, "I'm not here as a cop." "Then ask me like you were my daughter," Sam instructs. Catherine pauses again. And then we don't find out what asking like a daughter entails. Good thing Catherine's relationship with Sam isn't loaded with baggage or anything! I'm sure we're missing nothing interesting there.

(I find the relationship between these two fun to watch, if only because it seems as though they both wish Catherine didn't know Sam was her father. Then she could still adore him as a surrogate dad, instead of resenting him for being a half-assed parent and beating herself up for lapping up the stray affection all those years. And Sam could have a kid who loves him unconditionally, instead of demanding things from him.)

CSI

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